Hacking the McDonald’s menu

Nobody can resist the call of the golden arches. It’s not quite as cheeky as a Nando’s but manages to combine a pick-me-up, a hangover cure and a treat rolled into one bargain-priced meal deal. Having spent a year working behind the counter, there a few insider tips that you may not be aware of.

Cheap As Chips

There’s nothing worse than dragging your hungover carcass to McDonalds, dipping your hand into that crisply-folded paper bag to pull out a handful of cold, limb fries. Unfortunately the fries are all cooked together, and then served as required. During busy periods, this is practically instant, guaranteeing hot, fresh fries in a minute or less. However if it’s quiet, they could have sat there a short time leaving you with lukewarm, slightly soggy chips. To combat this, order your fries without salt (and add your own). A salt free batch HAS to be cooked up fresh just for you, meaning you won’t be disappointed.

Be Picky

We all know the taste when your burger is less than fresh off the grill. Much like fries, the burgers (not chicken, just beef) are prepared and then served as needed (within a certain time limit of course). If you want yours to be made fresh to order, simply remove/change one ingredient and a whole new one will be cooked to your requirements. This could simply by “no lettuce” or some branches will let you add extra patties or even bacon. Although the rules vary across the different outlets, it’s worth investigating – you could really create the burger of your dreams.

Joke Of A Coke

So you order a large coke, and three sips later it’s gone. Thirst barely quenched and damn those chips are salty. This has a simple solution – a large coke cup with ice, will contain EXACTLY the same amount of coke as a medium. In fact most mediums are half ice, half coke. To combat this and get your moneys worth (being students after all) order a large coke, “no ice” and if you’re really that desperate, ask for a cup of ice (provided free of charge of course). They’ll catch on to your game but you’ve done nothing wrong, so smile sweetly as you sip your full beverage and walk away.

6 Box Of Regret

Got your Big Mac meal in hand but a small part of you is craving nuggets. Surely the best idea is just to add a cheeky six box? Wrong. The deal with McDonalds is that when you buy things in a meal, they are so much cheaper. Its understandable that you might not want chips/coke but if you buy 6 nuggets you’ll pay £2.89 (*price varies by location and correct at time of publishing*), and for an extra 90p you get the whole meal. And for £4.19 you get 20. Either split those with a friend, or order a happy meal – four nuggets for less money and everybody knows you want the toy.

McDiet Friendly?

Sometimes when your friends all drag you there, peer pressure I get it, you might pretend you don’t want anything, but we all know you do. However, having poured your hard earned cash into a gym membership and churning several hours a day into your six pack, we all know McDonalds isn’t your healthiest choice. Not all is lost, you can make good choices!  Everyone assumes the meal deal comes with the burger/chicken product of choice, chips and a drink. True if you go with bog standard. The fries can easily be switched to a fruit bag or carrot sticks (who knew). The drink can be pure orange juice, diet coke or water. I didn’t say your friends might not be confused, but your bikini bod remains intact.

STUDENT CARD. DON’T TURN UP WITHOUT IT.

If you haven’t realized that simply by being at university you can get FREE stuff, you’re very behind. It’s advertised everywhere (#studentwin). A student card gets you some cheeky freebies at McDonalds – we are talking with every meal, either a free cheeseburger, Mcflurry or mayo chicken! Turn your meal into two courses, help out a friend whose loan hasn’t come in yet or simply double up on something as what kind of student refuses free food?

McDonalds Worker Minimum Wages? New Best Friend.

Working at McDonalds does have a certain rep. But trust me, nearly everyone is a student, and a good laugh. If you are genuine and friendly, who knows how they might help you out. We were given certain quotas to fill in terms of how full to make fries, how much Mcflurry topping to sprinkle or how many bags to use. However, if customers are especially good at banter or charming, the rules can be bent. A smile and a quick chat can earn you a few extra fries, a Mcflurry full to the brim or your bags packed so everything doesn’t fall out the second you leave the restaurant. It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.

So now you’re armed with a few sneaky hacks, you can feel slightly less guilty about that hungover treat – at least you got every pennies worth, truly lovin’ it.