The SUSU Shop has stopped selling chewing gum

In the biggest campus news of 2015 so far, we can report that The SUSU Shop no longer sells chewing gum.  The Shop, known for it’s wide assortment of sandwiches and […]


In the biggest campus news of 2015 so far, we can report that The SUSU Shop no longer sells chewing gum. 

The Shop, known for it’s wide assortment of sandwiches and odd music choices, will no longer be selling chewing gum due to a request from the University.

The news was brought to our attention yesterday when a shocked student was told by a lady on the tills that SUSU had issued a note saying they’re not selling it anymore, because of ‘mess’.

The news was then confirmed by Union President, David Mendoza-Wolfson. He told us:

The University asked us to stop selling it due to mess

He claims sales were low anyway:

That made us look into how well it sold. If it sold well, we wouldn’t have stopped selling it.

Where the chewing gum used to be

This follows recent news that The Shop is going to start selling alcohol.

One student, who wished to remain anonymous, asked a terrifying question:

What will I do after my bacon and Stilton sandwich now?

A fourth year English and French student was not at all happy:

This scandal has brought a new level of fear to my university life. I fear the whole of Southampton Uni will loom with the scent of stale Jesticles and Chick-o-Land and soon human contact will become not only undesirable but a health hazard.

One distressed Final Year student pointed out:

I thought it was meant to be good for concentrating, do they want to make January exams any harder?

Soton Tab veteran, Joe Rosi, didn’t really care about the news. He said:

I couldn’t give two monkeys.

Supplies are already running low

Are SUSU cowering to the University? First chewing gum, what next?

Anything but the Costa machine, please.

What do you think about The Shop stopping selling chewing gum? Is it the right solution?