Sun, Sex & Soton Tab: Kavos

In the second of our Sun, Sex & Soton Tab series we sent Features Editor Connie Suggitt and friends to Kavos to see what all the fuss was about. (Don’t forget to check out the Maga edition here)!

Last year the programme What Happens in Kavos was suspended from T.V after reps, locals, and Greek tourism officials complained about the way in which Kavos was presented. Greek Tourism Minister Olga Kefalogianni was quoted as saying “Greece, Corfu and the tourism product we offer in any case does not have this repulsive image presented”. The reps working in Kavos said the camera men would tail the most drunk and outlandish characters, and would use the footage of a few to generalise the behaviour of many. Was the team of camera men purposefully portraying Kavos as something that it’s not? Was the sexual promiscuity, binge drinking and general debauchery falsely generated for the programme to fuel the image of a lewd and depraved Kavos? I went along with three other Southampton students to find out.

1. The Strip Itself

The strip is where everything goes on in regards to night life, and is where all the bars and restaurants are too. This also means reps. Lots and lots of reps. Be warned; they will pick you up and run with you to their bar. I know this from experience. NOS is also a massive thing in Kavos, known to you and me as Laughing Gas, so expect to see canisters and balloons littering the floor everywhere you go.

The reps are almost as bothersome and numerous as the Albanian Gypsies trying to sell you Roses or glow sticks. When I first saw a group of them I felt really awful; one of the women was pregnant and there were children there as young as seven. A rep saw my concern and told me to be careful, as they’re notorious for mugging sympathetic tourists.

The strip runs parallel to the beach; perfect for those who want to have a midnight dip or find somewhere more private among the seaweed and litter. It’s also a great place to get robbed, as one of my friends found out.

All the clubs and bars are pretty samey and blend into one drunken blur, and the strip offers little variety in terms of music. Like Turn Down For What? No? Too bad.

A favourite which stuck out a bit more was the Rolling Stone. The Rolling Stone is to Kavos what Jesters is to Southampton, playing 90s classics and cheese alongside the standard pop songs. Another place which stood out was T.K.D’s. It is a restaurant that doubles as a shisha bar, the shisha bar being on a balcony at the back. Definitely go here if you’re after more of a chilled evening. 

 2. Who you’ll find in Kavos 

Firstly, the main thing on everyone’s mind is sex. I remember on our first night we went up the road to the supermarket to get some bottles of water, and as we were walking back to our hotel, laden with shopping, some guy shouted out ‘WELL DONE LADS! PULLED ALREADY!’ to my two male friends. I couldn’t help but laugh. I mean, how many guys would look at that situation and think that the boys were trying to wine and dine us with Lays crisps and water that wouldn’t make us shit ourselves? The majority of guys and girls go to Kavos for one reason, and that is reason is to pull.

The Men

Ladies, if you love guys in backward snapbacks and vests with tribal tattoos, look no further. Kavos is the place for you. Most guys decided to burn a vest outline on themselves so they could do their two favourite things at the same time, be topless and wear a vest. Another thing I noticed about men’s fashion in Kavos is that it seems a ‘thing’ to have your shorts rolled up as much as possible. One rep I met (who was coincidentally from Southampton Solent) had shorts that were so tight and rolled up so far I feared for his fertility.

The Women

The girls of Kavos are something to marvel at, they really are. I’m not saying they aren’t classy, but in some club toilets I saw a girl wipe her arse with a bin. A BIN. I also saw many girls walking around in vests (more vests!) saying ‘Keep Calm  and Eat my C*nt’. Apparently some people took this invitation literally, as walking past empty outdoor restaurant benches we saw two shadows, and it turned out to be a guy doing just that to a lucky girl. Yes. That actually happened. I was talking to one guy about a girl who had come back to his room and he described her as ‘awful and rancid’. But come on, she was trying to impress four guys at once! Give the poor girl a break.

3. Food and Drink

I think I finally understood how much the holiday would be steeped in alcohol when I realised wine was cheaper than juice and beer was cheaper than soft drinks. Although prices depended on where you went, the standard deal was a headf*cker, a fishbowl and two shots for 5 euros. A headf*cker is a marvellous yet simultaneously revolting creation that is a pint which consists of 9 different spirits topped up with juice. Tastes awful but gives you the confidence needed to dance on that podium or in that cage. Another famous drink in Kavos is Rodney’s Melons. These can be bought at Rodney’s or T.K.D’s and basically are a hollowed out watermelon filled with spirits. It’s an estimated 45 minutes drinking time with upwards of 10 shots per person. Goodbye dignity, hello drunken indecency.

Food in Kavos is on the whole very cheap, very average and catered to us English. Pretty much everywhere does the standard full English breakfast, pizza, burgers and chips. Kavos obviously got the memo about Brits being obsessed with Nandos, because most restaurants offered some kind of Peri-Peri chicken section on their menus. A couple of restaurants which were above the rest were The Drunken Squid and Roussos. The Drunken Squid is a Tex-Mex place set a bit back from the strip. Despite the price being a bit higher than other places, it’s worth the extra money. My only concern was that although three out of four of us felt fine afterwards, it gave one of my friends with a delicate stomach some problems. With how awful Greek plumbing is, it was a tense twenty four hours for all of us.

 4. Events

The Paint Party at Trinity was insane and a really good night, although if you go be prepared to swallow a lot of potentially harmful neon paint. I would also recommend the Full Moon party at Atlantis and the strip of beach next to it. This night involves UV paint, whistles, glow sticks, buckets full of alcohol, and fireworks on the beach. Need I say more? I would definitely recommend booking some of these official events, but if you’re looking for a cheaper night the strip offers great alternatives.  

Despite the horrors I witnessed and the stories I heard, I couldn’t help but love Kavos, and as long as you have the right ‘f*ck it’ mentality and low expectations, I’m sure you will too!

Catch up with our first installment of Sun, Sex & Soton Tab: Maga here.

Have you been to Kavos? What did you think? Let us know in the comments.