SCUMMY SOTON: Thugs Use Ducklings As Target Practice

Over the past few weeks the student ghetto of Portswood has been at the centre of drama with it playing host to fires, drug dens and a murder. But it seems this time Southampton’s scummy reputation has moved away from the ‘hood, here’s a roundup of some outrageous and abhorrent happenings in the city recently.

Hooded thugs target baby ducks with catapults and pellets
A group of sick youths have used baby ducks as target practice at a nature reserve near Hythe where 3 were killed and several more injured. The abominable teens used a catapult and lead pellets to maim the ducklings and even caused one of the baby birds to have its insides hanging out; it was consequently put down by a vet. The local community are disgusted by this awful incident and have branded those to blame as “vile individuals”. So far no culprits have been caught.

Southampton man urinates on ferry food counter
A 26 year old man managed to storm the bridge of a Red Jet high speed ferry twice after crew refused to let him go to the toilet. Toilets on the vessel were out of order, resulting in the man urinating all over a refreshment counter and causing over £1000 worth of damage to food and the boat out of service for 2 days whilst it had to be deep cleaned. During the incident a 19 year old crew member was threatened and the man in question has admitted to abusive behaviour, criminal damage and causing violence on a ship likely to endanger its navigation.

Partygoers attacked by rogue radiator
Several people were scalded by boiling water after a radiator was knocked off of a wall. The incident occurred when a couple had a domestic in Club 4, near the docks, and the man ran into a radiator and dislodged it from the wall. Witnesses reported boiling hot water spraying from the ceiling and the radiator showering those in the vicinity. Several people were treated at the scene by paramedics for scalds to the face and eyes.

With Southampton being far from short of disgraceful incidents it won’t be long before our next edition of Scummy Soton is available. In the meantime, check out some truly scummy stories here and here.