Anush from Balti King gives us his Valentine’s love tips
His ideal woman is Jessica Alba
The day is finally upon us, and the Balti King big name and general man of the people Anush has prepared some very special romantic advice for all you lovers out there.
Admittedly, upon the approach down Fullwood Road, the trepidation in the air was rife. Would BK’s advice match the incredibly enlightening standard set by Dan Bean last year?
Yet, under the warm glow of the Balti King lights, Anush looked positively thrilled at the prospect of becoming S10’s latest love guru. And his answers certainly didn’t disappoint.
Following the usual formalities, selfies and ceremonial donning of the Tab top, Anush was raring to impart his long-anticipated romantic wisdom.
Hi Anush, we’ll start off with a more personal question. What do you look for in a woman?
Okay then. And what would be your ideal date?
“Just take ’em somewhere nice….a nice meal perhaps.”
“Probably Balti King.”
And what would be your dream valentine’s day?
“Just take ’em somewhere nice and peaceful…and just spend a good time you know.”
“I’d probably take ’em to a restaurant.”
Great. So food is important to you on a date?
“When you have a drink you can’t really chat or nothing.”
“Sitting down for dinner you can have a lovely chat.”
Quite so. So what’s been your most memorable date?
“When you met someone for the first time and just fell in love and you tell them you love ’em.”
Oh really? So that’s happened to you?
“It’s going to.”
Cool. So in terms of advice, how would you approach a secret valentine?
“Keep them calm and make them flowers or a card or something.”
“As a gift you could get them a nice perfume. Like an expensive one.”
What are your do’s and don’ts on a date?
“Go somewhere nice and quiet. Probably chat.”
“And don’t have too much drink. Then they won’t end up as your girlfriend.”
Yeah that’s very wise. Is it a good idea to make a move on the first date?
“Not really. Making a move straight away is the worst thing someone could do.”
Oh what a gentleman. So what advice would you give to those who are alone on valentine’s day?
That’s a bit depressing.
“No just go somewhere, you can find somebody nice.”
What would you do if someone left you on valentine’s day?
“Break everything. Then leave.”
Oh so what are you doing for Valentine’s day?
“I’m working. Balti King is going to be really busy on Valentine’s day.”
Naturally. So what one piece of romantic advice would you give people?
“Make sure whoever you love, the love is real, not fake love just for valentine’s day. If you love someone just love them properly.”