Every type of person at this weekend’s paint party
So much paint
The SU’s annual paint party is the one night of the year when people show their true colours. Who’s cowering in the back when the guns come out and who are the avid fans screaming for the sticky fluorescent paint?
This year we were even treated to an illuminated shower on stage, where people showed off their best twerking to the whole SU. There’s no hiding your shame – we know who you are.
The paint dodgers
They’re completely spotless, the ones who are sprinting down the hall when the DJ calls two minutes until the paint is poured. They’re so over paint parties but can’t resist the SU’s sticky allure. Don’t go near them if you are painted, unless you want a knuckle sandwich.
The accidentally sprayed
They end up looking like a 10-year-olds scribbling, fairly clean with a good range of colour. These are the people who duck or lie on the floor when the guns are out. You’ll find them lurking around Tommy’s bar wiping any paint specs off their clothes onto unsuspecting freshers.
The ones who use their friend as a shield
They spend their evening purposefully boogying behind their poor unaware friend who ends up being the only one getting drenched. They’re the cowards of the group, scummier than the paint. Test your friends with a water gun before you go out to check if they flinch. After all, you don’t want to have to take one for the team.
The casual colourers
Sporting a colourful chic look, they’re just here for the experience. Never venturing from the outskirts of the dancefloor, they’re happiest if they’re only mildly messy and sticky. Coming once was enough for them, so they won’t be back next year. That hasn’t stopped them from having the “best night ever guys!”
The friends who stick together…literally
These people can’t be pulled apart from each other or the middle of the d-floor, resulting in paint in every possible crevice. Look out for them performing their synchronised dance to anyone and everyone.
The fully committed
They’re ignoring the paint and powering through to make sure they make the most of their £5 entry fee. When they’re not in the middle of the dancefloor, they’re stocking up on some hard-earned VKs.
The paint for life crowd
They love the paint life probably more than they love their pals. The sheen on their face isn’t happy dance sweat, it’s a thick layer of slime. All they want to do is be in the paint, so much so that already they’re counting down the days until the next paint party.
They wilfully take the brunt of the goop so we don’t have to. Found at the front, mouths open ready for the gun to shower them with their favourite nectar, they don’t even stop when their eyes are glued shut. No, instead they soldier on through the pain.