Here’s what you can learn by watching Netflix all day instead of going to the library

A year into uni and I definitely don’t feel like I learned £9,000 of knowledge. So, I decided to ditch the revision for a day and see how much I could learn from my trusty friend Netflix instead. After all, it’s only £5.99 a month, a bargain compared to what we’re all paying in fees, so it’s worth considering as an alternative. (Plus, I had an exam coming up so testing this theory gave me a brilliant excuse to watch my favourite shows and not feel guilty for it).

My other attempts at procrastination were just leading me towards really weird Youtube videos

Science/Forensics: Dexter

Anyone who tells me touching dead body parts and looking at blood cells through a microscope is their true passion will be considered a weirdo. You’re the guy at the SU bar in the floor-length leather coat sipping a glass of neat Captain Morgan’s aren’t you? But I’m not here to judge, I’m here to see if Dexter could teach me the same amount as your science degree.

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? 4/10. Dexter always gets away with it too easily. This can’t be real life. Also, I swear it would be harder to kill people than that? This probably won’t help you learn anything Science or Forensics-wise, but I would highly recommend the show if there’s anyone you’ve been wanting to murder.

Hey lil mamma lemme whisper in yo ear

Medicine: House

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? 10/10. After eight seasons (176 hour-long episodes) of House, you’ll be physically and emotionally drained. But, I’m pretty sure you’ll be able to successfully administer a spinal drainage. Also, you now know it’s never fucking Lupus. Save your money medics, and just watch this.

Law: How To Get Away With Murder

Similar to Dexter, this show has taught me so many valuable life lessons, the main one being “how to kill someone and not get caught”. I’m not a lawyer but HTGAWM (catchy, huh?) has taught me loads of law jargon, so if that’s your degree it’s probably quite a useful form of revision.

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? 6/10. Like Dexter, I suspect the show is a bit too smooth. Nothing could ever go this well for a lawyer that’s involved in the murder of their own client. However, in the classroom scenes, I did learn some stuff about law, though only criminal law. Truth be told, it’s probably about as informative as Legally Blonde.

You should always bury a body vertically? Do I look like I’m capable of digging five foot nines worth of hole for my ex’s corpse?

Maths: The Office (US)

Why did you choose Maths as a degree? Who hurt you? Your life is probably devoid of humour so you may as well give up on revising, watch The Office, realise you’re going to end up an accountant, and learn how to become the Toby of your future workplace.

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? 0/10. Unfortunately for you, you chose maths. No TV show can really save you. If you’re really butt-hurt about that, why didn’t you just do drama instead?

English: Peep Show

Obviously the best degree calls for the best TV show. Every English student’s essay on Bernstein’s “The Poem Left Intentionally Blank” sounds exactly like a 1,500 word extension of Jez’s inner monologue.

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? 10/10. If you do English you can legit do anything and it probably teaches you the same as your degree. Watch a TV show and put the subtitles on. You’re reading words, so you’re essentially just doing extra revision. Go you.

Me when trying to justify my point in an essay by vaguely referring to the Bible

Drama: Shakespeare Adaptations

Did you pick a drama degree because you loved the bit where you got to act out parts of Twelfth Night in your GCSE English lessons, but couldn’t spell “Shakespeare” no matter how hard you tried? If so, the various modern day adaptations are for you. Watch that one with Leonardo Di Caprio in it and maybe his abs will help you understand the storyline and get the 2:2 in your essay that you’ve always dreamed of.

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? 8/10. Shakespeare adaptations are all dumbed down versions of the real thing. but then again, Drama is the dumbed down version of English Literature, so yeah, probably useful.

Business Studies: The Big Bang Theory/F.R.I.E.N.D.S

Business students have a really basic sense of humour. There’s nothing I can suggest to save these poor souls.

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? 10/10. Have you ever heard of anyone that failed a business studies “degree”? Why are you even reading this article, shouldn’t you be in Wetherspoons discussing your plans to be CEO of Apple with your fellow Aberystwyth business pals?

Hair & Beauty/Fashion: RuPaul’s Drag Race

Why is it every beauty student I see looks like a blind toddler let loose with Monet’s colour palette? And why does every fashion student exclusively wear plain Topshop jeans, a pleather jacket and those fugly Adidas Superstars? Where’s the creativity people? Where’s the style? Either choose a different degree, or take some advice from the fabulous Queens of RuPaul’s Drag Race. Now, sashay away.

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? 10000/10. Watching this will most likely be a hundred times more useful than your degree.

Geology: Breaking Bad

Simply for the line “THEY’RE NOT ROCKS, THEY’RE MINERALS MARIE”. Surely that’s enough revision for your whole degree anyway. What do geologists even do to revise? Go outside and look at some pebbles or something.

Could I watch this instead of getting a degree? Copy and paste rating and reason from Hair & Beauty/Fashion.