Ten things you’ll understand if you go to Royal Holloway

1. You have seen in a new day in at least one of these places, with a can of Red Bull and a twinge of procrastination related regret.

2. The procrastination all started as a result of a few hours study break at this place – Absolute Filth, anyone?

3. Budgens has been your late-night alcohol run saviour/worst enemy the day after when you realise you spent THAT MUCH on ropey vodka.

4. If you don’t have a car, this place is your Westfields. No, really- Kingston and Windsor are far too far on the train.

Staines- who the hell even needs more than 5 shops anyway? It has a Wetherspoons, right?

5. However, you can justify a taxi for a trip to Windsor for a Thursday night at Liquid. Foam party, anyone?

6. The back gate has been equal to Mount Everest after a late one… Or just after a misjudged Papa John’s.

The back gate steps- Next year, let’s live in Englefield Green.

7. During summer you have sat here and listened to at least one rendition of ‘Wonderwall’ from a guy with an acoustic guitar and Ray Bans.

8. You have met a whole host of interesting characters on the Shhh! Bus- and every single one of them will laugh at you if you rip your trousers whilst getting on- Even that guy with sick down his shirt.

9. You have lived in frigging Hogwarts!

10. You’re completely aware how lame Egham is. But only you are allowed to say it.

Egham station- Charmingly crappy. You’re home.