Every type of person you’ll live with in halls

You’re probably one of them

It doesn't matter what year you're in or where you've lived we've all experienced the classic flat stereotypes.

The Stoner

This is defintely the most chilled out person you'll meet, a British version of Bob Marley, relaxed, nice and always have their cupboard packed with the best snacks. There really is no bad stuff about this person because they never care enough to react to what the group chat is raging about. Their ramblings at one in the morning make your entire day and as long as you don’t mind your flat occasionally stinking of "that good shit" as they call it, you’ll love having this person next door.

The No Hangover One

Everyone knows someone like this and even if we won’t say it out loud we all agree, we hate this person. They can go out and down a dozen pints or 10 jaeger bombs, blackout but then will be in perfect condition for their 9am the next morning. They either have been blessed by god or passed their hangover onto you , either way we're jealous.

The Hungover One

Now this one we can all relate to, everyone no matter who you are will have that night where you try a new drink and it kills you. However this person will always be able to find that "new drink" which kills them and you get to enjoy the sound of chundering at two in the morning. Alongside the subsequent moaning and snapchats about dying the next day. We may not hate you like we hate those who don’t hang, but don’t get me wrong the hatred is still there when we're put on duty to make sure you don't die in your sleep.

The Clean Freak

Everyone likes keeping things clean and in a kitchen with a lot of people, this can be a hard thing to do. However they decide that they are king or queen of the kitchen and are always in charge of cleaning up everyone’s mess. Normally they will openly make a big deal about how they're always the one to clean and how when you do it, you do it wrong. Initially they are a god send but give it time, you’ll realise how quickly they get on your nerves.

The Music Enthusiast One

They prey on the unfortunate ones stuck in our box rooms with paper thin walls and force us to love their music. Now if the music taste is good you'll have endless hours of fun, throw caution to the wind and just start yelling requests. If not, then I really hope you enjoy wearing headphones all the time. Or, if you are the blunt type then shut them down fast. Just hope that they vary the music instead of playing Ed Sheeran’s new album on repeat.

The Hidden One

You don’t know them, your next door neighbour doesn’t know them, the girl across the hall said she saw them but she’s lying. They get food delivered in and you may strike lucky and hear some noise from their room but that’s all you'll get. Now if you see them out and about my god are you lucky, you’ll double take to try and get a photo but before you can they're once again gone. Much like a ghost everyone suspects their existence but we can't actually confirm it.

The Passive Aggressive One

Now who doesn’t love an endless supply of post it notes on the fridge and passive aggressive messages on the group chat explaining how they're sick of everyone else's crap being in "their space". These people will normally have you rolling around on the floor laughing as their group chat antics have forced you to create a new bitching group chat. Now comes the BIG decision, who's going to kick them out of the chat. Tread carefully here because damn can that person get scary when the passive isn’t there to stop the aggressive.

The Couple

This is the most difficult of all as it all depends on how much you like their significant other. If you love them then it’s just another friend in the flat who's always around to have fun. But if you don’t then boy does it suck. You walk into your kitchen ready to throw a pizza in the oven and drink yourself into a coma then boom there they are. Sat in your bloody seat just staring at you, you don’t want to be awkward so you try and make conversation but it’s stale and boring. All you want to do is ask why are they still here, like come on it’s been two weeks don’t you have a home to go to? Its basically a pick mix, who knows who you could end up with.

So there we have it, the eight people than you absolutely will have lived with or will live with during your time at university.

P.S. Be wary. You might be one of them.

More
University of Portsmouth