Get over it: you’re going to miss your pet in Hilary

They’re probably going to forget about you anyway


For many of us, going back to university in January means saying goodbye to your friends and family, but more importantly, your beloved pet.

‘I won’t miss you’

You’re back in Oxford, and you just don’t feel complete without being covered in cat hair, the ten minute search for your shoes after your dog has stolen them, or the soothing background rumble of hamster on its bloody wheel again at 4am.

You complain about it when you’re home.  Your friends say you look unkempt when you turn up to see them sleep deprived with a hairy jumper and chewed shoes.  Your pets get you up at the crack of dawn to feed them or to let them out for a wee, and then they stand in the doorway for ten minutes, not quite sure whether they want to go out.

It wasn’t me…

They eat your chicken if you leave it on the kitchen counter, inspect each other’s bowel movements and then come to you for kisses.  They chew your stationery, prefer your siblings, hog the sofa and make the soft furnishings smell funny.

But the second you’re back in Oxford, you can’t imagine life without dear little Mittens.  You kind of forget about him directing his sexual urges at your childhood teddy bear. You remember the good times over Christmas – snuggles on the sofa, festive winter walks, the companionship.

You remember your clichéd moments around the tree

Seeing your pet on webcam will make you feel like they’re right there in the room, without all the scratching and biting.  Anyone who says Skype is exclusively for human communication is wrong, although you will need a human at the other end who is willing to set the computer up for Fluffy.

I g2g now

One of the main drawbacks is that your pets will care less about a pixelated image of you than you will of them, and will be prone to walking away, so these moments are precious, yet fleeting.

An alternative piece of advice would be just to try and put them out of your mind.  If your brother sends you Snapchat updates, block him, if your mum tells you about the ferret, tell her you have to go. The sad truth is, while your dog be mopey for a bit, they’ll get over it, and cats really couldn’t care less.  I doubt your goldfish knows who you are quite frankly, so as long as someone keeps feeding them, they probably won’t give you a second thought.  Hope that helps.

Who are you again?

Finally, while this is less advisable for romantic relationships, for pet relationships, filling the void through the affections of local animals will give you your fluff fix.  Oxford is full or college cats and tortoises, the park is an ideal spot to see dogs frolicking, and if you like them very still, there is plenty of wildlife in the natural history museum.

Erasmus, one of Oxford’s fluffiest BNOCs

At the very least, Oxford term is short, and before you know it, you’ll be reunited.  Your dog will be delighted to see you (your cat won’t…soz) and the love-hate cycle will commence once again.