7 Easy Ways to get out of Collections
What’s the alternative? Doing them?
Zachary SpiroCollections are rubbish – let’s face it. Doing well isn’t even an option. Here’s our guide to worming your way out of actually doing them:
1
Take some Acid.
Woah. Like…. woah.
A decent trip will last some 12 hours, more than long enough to skip a measly 3-hour collection.
2
Lock yourself in the toilets.
What are they going to do? Break in and drag you out?
3
Go punting.
Come and get me now, tutors.
Because nothing says “I’m not going to collections” like five metres of water on either side of you.
4
Take a really really long shower.
So… Warm…
You wouldn’t want to go to a collection smelling bad, would you?
5
Don’t set your alarm.
This one doesn’t even require effort.
If you’re particularly lazy, then this can even work for afternoon collections.
6
Get hammered the night before and end up in a foreign country.
This guy is definitely not making it to his collections.
Bonus if you can make it further than Paris, like this teenager from Oldham.
7
Pretend you go to Brookes.
Not a collection in sight
No seriously, this one isn’t even that hard.
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