A little piece of me dies every time Baywatch comes on at Ocean

I know I’m not the only one

People stare at me, people question how I can even be a true Nottingham student and people wonder whether I have a problem. Nope, no problem, I just hate Baywatch at Ocean.

It’s not a disease, you can’t catch it if you get too close – but if you are topless at Ocean please don’t get too close. I can’t stand when sweaty, drunken students, mainly men take their tops off for the unfortunate eyes of us normal club goers to see. Do you think I want my drink whipped out of my hand by your t-shirt flinging around in the air? Do you think I want to be smacked in the face by your sweat-soaked t-shirt? No. No I do not.


It’s especially painful for those of us who are below 5’10, the average height of most men, because we are perfect armpit height. Meaning when Baywatch comes on we are assaulted by not only sweaty bodies but face-height BO smelling armpits.

What I really hate is the expectation to take your shirt off. The assumption it’s something all people will enjoy and take part in. It’s all a game of who is more confident than who, a game of showing off how good your body is and making people feel uncomfortable if they don’t have the confidence to take their shirts off. Unless they’re so off their head drunk they aren’t themselves, and hey that’s a great selling point.

It spreads to the lecture halls

It spreads to lecture halls

I remember my first Ocean vividly, the excitement of a club that played music I could reminisce to my childhood about, and then all of a sudden the freshers reps were taking their shirts off, waving them over their heads and my new-found friends were doing the same. It was surreal and horrifying, I felt awkward because I didn’t feel confident enough to join in.

And that has been the same feeling I’ve been plagued with every Friday I’ve taken a dip in the Ocean. No matter how sober or drunk I am, I will never find this weird Nottingham tradition fun or “banter”.

A perfect example of what I mean, losing your shirt at any other club would be seen as weird, you’d probably be thrown out. But no, just a common occurrence at Ocean.

Don’t get me wrong I love Ocean, its cheesy deliciousness is exactly what I want on a Friday night, I just cannot stand when Baywatch starts to play. The dread creeps in, the fear of a sweaty body rubbing against an unwelcoming me. Why must people, in the hottest club on earth, take their shirts off and rub their sweaty bodies against people? It’s just something I can never get on board with.