Boring Beeston is the most adulterous town in the UK with 941 affairs happening right now

Why do we all live in Lenton


Beeston, that boring place on the other side of uni park, has been awarded the title of the UK’s most adulterous town, with a staggering 941 affairs currently taking place.

According to stats released this week by the Official Infidelity Index, 2.54 per cent of the town’s population are currently cheating on their partner.

Home of many charity shops and creepy statues.

Home of many charity shops and creepy statues

These figures are out of character for Beeston, which is usually known for its quiet atmosphere, lack of amenities and rubbish halls of residence like Albion House.

Experts says that extra marital affairs can be caused by frustration, loneliness and isolation, all things that can be found in abundance in Beeston.

Home to Broadgate- the most boring hall

Home to Broadgate- the most boring hall

Beeston resident Tom said: “Don’t let these statistics fool you, I’ve lived in Beeston for nearly two years and never encountered anyone exciting enough to be having an affair.”

The saucy goings on could lead to a surge of students moving to the town in the hope of getting a bit more exhilaration in their lives, but its doubtful.

The top ten UK towns for having affairs were:

  1. Beeston
  2. Livingston
  3. Maidenhead
  4. Taunton
  5. Runcorn
  6. Newcastle-under-Lyne
  7. Guildford
  8. Farnborough
  9. Bracknell
  10. Loughborough

Craigavon in Northern Ireland was the most faithful town, with only a mere 0.04 per cent of the population seeing someone they shouldn’t.