The Tab Tries: Board Games (Whilst Intoxicated, Obviously)
The Tab mars childhood memories and turns board games into debauchery.
The Tab: Never Afraid to Mar Childhood Memories
What happens when you stray from those classic drinking games of Never Have I Ever or Ring of Fire?
The Tab went on a mission to turn wholesome family fun and grandma’s favourite evening fillers Trivial Pursuit, Twister and Roulette into new ‘prinking’ material (Note: things turned a lot less child friendly with the introduction of alcohol. The 3+ age restriction should be reconsidered).
Hush the testing queries of your pre-lash guests as they demand entertainment by releasing these bad boys:
After deep consideration and commissioning countless public think tanks, The Tab concluded that board games and alcohol were probably the only ingredients you needed.
You’re welcome, world.
Night 1 and there’s Nothing Trivial About It
For girls (and guys) who love their wine nights, Trivial Pursuit makes for some good entertainment. No shots in this game, just a LOT of wine.
Rules: get an answer right and you gain the ability to persecute the livers of others. Get a question wrong, and you’ll be downing two fingers. Of alcohol.
Using your own brain cells to ensure others lose theirs. Hashtag battle of the cells.
Instead of sticking to the dull, brainy questions (sorry Paxman), The Tab personalised them, for instance, “Who did Emily get with last week in Crisis?” and “What did Gemma lose at Ocean?”
Note: the answer was not “her virginity”.
That you are, sir. That you are.
Trivia cards, Domino’s and headaches. The Ocean Wash Up.
Night 2 and it’s Time to Take Our Chances on The Roulette Wheel
Barely recovered, Lady Luck mercilessly calls. We’re excited, see:
However, excitement quickly turned to dread.
Note: do not play Roulette on a hangover, especially because this involves shots. You do not want to be downing vodka under the prickly haze of a wine headache. Still, The Tab waged bravely on.
On the plus side, it doesn’t require much thinking, which is good because we’re doing degrees and they’re hard enough. Whatever number the ball lands on, knock back that number of shots. When the number gets too high, you can hand them out. Shotting is bonding. No, that doesn’t work.
Anyway, it’s a great icebreaker to drag those ‘sit on the sofa and stare at my chinos’ types from the pre-lash shadows.
Day 3: Twist ‘n Shout…’n take your clothes off
Drink ‘n strip Twister was last in The Tab’s arsenal of pre-lash proposals.
Twister = compromising positions + alcohol – clothes = baby anyone can do those sums.
Lower a knee, stumble or lose control of an elbow and the punishment was to gain one shot and lose one article of clothing.
The Tab is not able to reveal what happened next. But when our careers look sunny side down, a video will be released onto the internet from an unknown source who we’ll be really, really angry with.
We’ve done the leg work, now let there never be a dull pre-lash again!