Part-time job? No thanks I’m a Student

Everywhere we turn we’re reminded of the recession; family friends being made redundant, rising house prices and, not to mention the fact that it is so much harder nowadays to secure a decent job after Uni.

The truth is that while I should be, I’m not even surprised to find out that only a quarter of students in university actually have a part-time job and that this figure has been declining steadily over the last 15 years.

What a joke, no wonder we are stereotyped for doing absolutely bog all. So we really are the laziest generation yet…

What’s your excuse?

Lack of time, want a 2:1…

The reality is that even with our minimal contact hours it’s not as if that really cuts it as an excuse.

If there’s time to lie in bed all Thursday morning, queue outside Cocotang for an hour and pump your poser bodies in the gym every other day, then you can definitely spare the time to earn some money and gain some respect in the workplace.

You are kidding yourself if you think that the 2:1 or 1st you’re aiming for can be your only priority at University. Employers are looking for people who can juggle priorities and manage their time wisely and a part-time job can easily prove this.

Lie in till 1pm most Thursdays

No jobs

This is preposterous. It’s not even as if it’s that difficult to get a job; all you have to reel off is that you’re Uni of… not Trent, and they’ll snap you up.

Let’s be honest, it’s more about the status of which job you get that bothers you. Unless you can get yourself some BNOC job dj-ing for Market Bar or handling the VIP door on Crisis, the majority of us not so cool kids are reduced to handing in our CV to the likes of John Lewis and Pizza Express.

It might feel like a naff job at the time, but you can always big it up in an interview. So quit moaning about constantly maxing out your overdraft after endless nights out and find a job that pays for your endless collection of Topshop booty shorts.

For anyone with higher aspirations, Bag o’ Nails is probably looking for a new manager.

Good luck with becoming a DJ…

Bank of Mummy and Daddy, Don’t need the money

While you may be relying on Mummy and Daddy to fund your extensive collection of snapbacks and Apple electronics, employers are now demanding that students actually have something more on their CV than their gap yah climbing mountains and re-enacting snowing in Bali.

You can’t forever rely on Waitrose deliveries charged to your parent’s account; eventually the money will stop, along with the Grey Goose.

It really is time you got off your boarding-school arses and learnt how to fend for yourselves before you get eaten alive by the big fish in those impressive law firms you’ll try to worm your way into.

In other words, unless you have a trust fund waiting for you at the other side of University it’s time to get a job.