7 Girls & 1 Mug: Christmas Dinner

Yuletide at the Fritzl’s and three feminist festive treats


As I’ve said before some of these girls love admin. Bridget seems to enjoy writing thank  you cards, more than she could ever enjoy receiving a gift.

Now in the female mind, the holy grail of organization appears to be the sacred seating plan. Warning, seating plan based discussions can get heated.The idea is that we all bring a ‘date’, so it will be 16 of us all sat round our kitchen table with a turkey and all the trimmings. Naively, I had no idea that were so many different dynamics that had to be considered when planning a Yule time feast.

As quite a hateful person, there are a lot of people I would prefer not to sit next to for the duration of a meal, but from the way the girls were going about this seating plan it seemed as though we were planning Christmas at the Fritzl’s

The meal itself was a massive success, with Bridget leading the way on the cooking front. The real climax of the meal was a no-hands-allowed Yule log eating contest by two of the male visitors which caused quite the stir. Boys can be disgusting.

We then moved into the kitchen where we continued to pardy with a d. At around this point we lost Mia to a Baileys induced chunder… this is when it got weird. Thoroughly tired out from all of the festivities, I decided it was my moment to retire for the evening. I headed for my room where I was confronted with a confusing sight – instead of three wise men, this Christmas involved three of the girls in my bed dressed up in wrapping paper.

The Brazzers element of this was severely detracted from by the fact Hannah was standing by the bed reading feminist literature aloud. To be more specific, ‘the myth of the female orgasm’. Taking their subliminal messaging as mildly offensive, I sent them on their way.

So it ended up being an evening of turkey, Baileys, chunder and a few feminists. Jesus would have been proud.

Merry Christmas all!