Would you pay to date this lonely hipster?

Are you tired of the traditional student dating pool? Bored of hunting for ‘the One’ every Saturday night in the LCR?

Well you’re in luck.

Step right up Gonzo’s Tea Room cocktail waiter – and self-confessed “hopeless romantic” – Tom Packer.

Working on the theory that it takes “13 dates” to find true love, Tom is crowdfunding his pathetic efforts to make them happen.

Form an orderly queue ladies

He’s currently trying to sponge a whopping £1,300 from the general public – as £100 seems “a fair enough average” for a “good personal date”.

In a truly cringe-worthy video, ex-BDSM blogger, Tom outlines his plans to find “a lady/partner in crime/personal femme fatale to share all this with me, teach me new things and put me in my place every now and again.”

Any lucky lads or ladies wishing to donate to Tom’s campaign will receive a number of treats from Packer.

Tom is self proclaimed “cocktail wizard” at Gonzo’s Team Room

Ranging from a personal “thank you” email for a donation of £1, to a signed photograph for a donation of £10.

£400 will even net you a hand written poem.

Tom penning one of his £400 poems

(On a side note, a member of The Tab has read these “poems”. She recommends keeping your cash.)

Top prize, however, is a £1000 romantic trip to Paris. Funded by you, of course.

Would you go to Paris with this man?

Despite appearances, student Lucy Morris (who shares a mutual friend with the wannabe lothario) says romance is the last thing on his mind:

“My friend met him at a Starbucks. They messaged for a while, and arranged to go to his flat to “watch a movie” the next week… then literally 10 minutes afterwards, he kicked her out and left her to get the morning-after pill on her own.

He’s even got a graph…romantic

“When she texted him again, he called her a cliche. He’s a prize.

“Oh, and he also told another friend to kill herself cos she’s fat.

“I have a feeling these dates may be a loss leader.”

Tom is now passing off his cringe-inducing attempt at romance as a “social experiment”.

And not everyone’s fallen for Tom’s charm. A petition has already been set up to have him “catapulted into the face of the sun”.

Any lucky ladies who still wish to help Tom on his quest can donate to his campaign here.

Everyone else who wants to have him fired into space can donate here.