Is Love Your Drug?

Starting university can play havoc with your emotions, the thought of leaving home and starting afresh is either a god-sent or a terrifying ordeal. For many, leaving home also means leaving your childhood sweetheart behind aka: your knight in shining armour who you thought had rescued you from eventual spinsterhood. Yet, when a real battle starts, he runs screaming leaving you to get trampled by his horse and to face the battle alone. Sound familiar?

It appears to be a common trend that the beginning of university comes with the end of something else. After experiencing such a transition and learning to live as a more independent version of yourself, perhaps you don’t want the hassle of revisiting your ‘old life’. This isn’t always the case but it seems that relationships back home can be very difficult to maintain, especially when it comes to trusting each other.

So what do we do when the one person we thought would be there forever has been left behind? Most likely you’ll feel like there’s a big gap in your life, but also relieved. University is a perfect time to start anew and let’s face it night’s out are definitely more fun when you’re single.

 However, it can prove difficult to curb your emotions and hormones after such a big change. As awful as it is to admit I’m sure most people have had a one night stand and university can be enough to make even the most sensible person feel like letting go and doing something considered a bit taboo.

With nights out being such a common form of socialising it’s hard to avoid what accompanies them. Being asked for your number or a drink can be a big confidence boost. After losing the person who was responsible for complimenting you before, you might be more likely to seek reassurance from others.

Going out with single friends can be more of an encouragement to attract attention from the opposite sex. You start off dancing and having fun and the next thing you know one friend is having a game of ‘tonsil tennis’ while the other is being offered enough shots to forget the guy she is with is no Brad Pitt.

At this point, it’s easy to allow yourself to get caught in the same net. You feel vulnerable because for the first time in years you are single and you miss a guy telling you you’re sexy and smart (and all the other things they say to get you into bed).

So there it begins, clubbing becomes a lusty search for love. All moral reasoning that ‘duh’ a guy chatting you up in a club probably only wants one thing, goes out the window and the need to be appreciated takes over.

The numerous comments on how good you look and the exchange of numbers (sometimes more) makes you feel wanted again. Soon enough this novelty wears off and you realise what you truly want is a man who can lie beside you, tell you you’re beautiful and not expect anything in return.

Someone who just smiles when you wake up in the morning with puffy eyes and funky breath and tells you how cute you look. This man doesn’t need to see you all glammed up to know your worth.

So, is it possible to find love in a club? Maybe it is, after all if you’re there and you’re a decent person there must be others the same. But, don’t let it become an addiction, the boost from all the compliments and men stealing you for a dance might feel good at the time but it can also make you feel very cheap.

So, know your worth, strut your stuff but know the right man is waiting somewhere and he will show you respect not shower you with cheesy one- liners.