A Newcastle student hosted an S&M/M&S themed birthday party

As themes go this one is pretty damn original.

What began as an ordinary shift at Ann Summers led me to staking out a property.

My journalist sense began to tingle when my manager had to haul all of the bondage outfits out of the stock room for the dozens of groups of students who were requesting them.

But it wasn’t just girls buying kinky items. I had served several guys who had purchased whips, bondage tape and kinky masks. One even bought stockings and a suspender belt and asked me to make sure they would fit him.

When I asked one of the customers why she was buying a backless pleather dress she told me about the S&M M&S party that was happening at a house in Jesmond.

This sounded bloody dodgy. After consulting with the Ann Summers girls I decided I should take a trip to Jesmond to spy what was happening.

At 11pm I loitered around the house, waiting to snap photos of students going into this den of debauchery.

One guest clocked me and said: “You are the most suspicious looking man in the world”.

I can’t think what he meant. I was dressed all in black, had a cigarette in one hand and a thermos of coffee in the other.

When I asked one guest, a man in a black leather nurses outfit, if I could take a picture, he refused:

“Ask someone else, I don’t wanna be seen in this.”  Surprise Surprise.

Just as I was starting to feel that this stakeout was a waste of time, I saw a gaggle of drunken girls staggering towards the house.

I jumped out at them and asked them why they’d chosen they’re outfits:

“Doing S&M was just easier, most of the girls have done it”.

“It’s nothing seedy, it’s just our mate’s birthday party”.

As it turned out, this was not some swingers party, it was actually a uniquely themed birthday party.

Unfortunately, none of those in leather wanted their faces in the photographs – understandable as that is the custom at S&M parties.

Those dressed as M&S were much more accommodating.

Toby Finnis, a second year Countryside Management (yeah that is a course) at Newcastle explained why he chose to do M&S rather than S&M:

“My mother loves Marks and Spencer and I enjoy expressing myself.”

His brother, Ollie, also gave his reasons for choosing his outfit:

“Marks is a bloody good retailer. I have had a tough life and I’m trying to enjoy myself.” Aren’t we all Ollie.

Another party goer told me she wanted to go “as an M&S turkey” but was persuaded otherwise.

Whilst I and those at the party were thoroughly amused by the whole thing, one angry neighbour was not:

“Some arsehole just told me to join the party. Get going now or I’m calling the police”.

The party dispersed pretty quickly after that.