20 places in Newcastle that are harder to get into than the US Capitol

Is the Robbo harder to fight your way through than Congress?

The world stood in shock on the 6th January as a mob of Trump supporters were able to access one of the most securitised buildings in America, the Capitol Building.

This should have been one of the hardest building to get into in the world. But, seeing as they were able to stroll on in and storm the Capitol with only a few pushes and shoves from security guards, I feel it is necessary to compare with Newcastle’s finest.

Trust me, some of these places are extremely hard to fight your way through, even if you are a Chloe Ferry lookalike.

1) Market Shaker toilets

Can anyone relate to the pain of having to wait 30 minutes to nip to the loo, blue treb in hand, because everyone wants to take pictures under the neon sign?

2. Tup Tup Palace top floor

Anyone know the secret password?

3. The Robbo in exam season 

Throwback to studying on the literal floor of the Robbo…

4. Oops on a Monday

But not if you flirt with Mr Oops himself.

5. The alley in Swingers 

Please let me in, I want to be cool!

6. Primark after lockdown

Embarrassing but I was there, and I was there early.

7. Francesca’s 

Nothing could beat that £6 half pizza/half pasta during Eat Out to Help Out.

8. When it’s McDonald’s Monopoly 

Maccies determination after a night out is real.

9. The Freshers’ Fair in the Students’ Union 

And you proceed to get all the tote bags and every single flyer.

10. The Shijo in the Students’ Union when it first opened

Half price katsu curry – you don’t have to tell me twice!

11. West Jesmond Metro station at 9am

Should I just sack off the lecture if I can’t squeeze on?

12. Topshop during student week 

Got to get those bargains!

13. Blanc on £2 Tuesdays

Don’t get me started when its England v Ireland – coming through, rugby boys!

14. Pret when everyone discovered the free subscription 

Is the 30 minute wait for an iced frappuccino worth it?

15. Holy Hobo on 2-for-1 Tuesdays 

I just want a picture with my two Zombies on the bike!

16. Tesco Metro during corona times 

Just let me get my nasty £4 bottle of rosé which I will definitely regret the morning after.

17. Turtle Bay during the bottomless brunch craze  

How about those 10 cocktails in two hours though?

18. Soho stairs and middle floor toilets 

I have witnessed multiple people peeing in the Soho sinks. It’s a real problem.

19. Wing Wednesday at Shark Club

39p for each wing means it’s obligatory to attend.

20. MSA when you’re taller than 5’2″

Nothing like a bump on the head to go with your hangover!

Featured image: The United States Capitol Building at night by AnthonyTPope, 6 September 2018, licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 International license.

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