We asked students to share the weirdest Tinder messages they’ve received
“Shag my arse”… not exactly Shakespeare
The typical Tinder conversation starters including “you up?” and “hey ;)” mark the beginning of many modern romances. At some point, however, everyone has received a message that has made them feel like they need to take a hot shower to scrub it off their skin. You’re probably guilty of sending a few too, because super liking each other means you’re practically soulmates right?
With certain flirty openers becoming almost too common now, people on Tinder are stating to get creative. We spoke to Newcastle students and collected the weirdest and most wonderful Tinder messages they have received during their time in the Toon.
Not very romantic but good to know they’re financially secure
Straight to the point and generous with the cash, we like it.
This message may be about as romantic as the 2am “you up?” text that every girl knows and dreads, but it’s direct, forward and a lot better than being led on for 3 months by a spice boy with a fake Canada Goose and a shit trim.
And let’s face it, student finance knows better than anyone that none of us are in a position to be turning down the free pennies.
The Nando’s reference is basic and he’s definitely recycled that line from his mate
Okay we get that you boys love your Nando’s, but referencing them in your pick up lines? C’mon now.
Bonus points for trying to come up with a funny line, but this boy would definitely do unspeakable things for a Nando’s black card. He will probably call you a wimp for not getting spicy rice but then go right ahead and order lemon and herb for himself. Are we wrong?
If you do choose to reply to this message you can expect a date to your local chicken joint and maybe he’ll even splurge on the bottomless soda (if you’re lucky).
Bit forward – settle down and let a girl get her education
In terms of weird Tinder openers this one is definitely up there.
“Shag my arse”? Is romance and chivalry really that dead and do you really want her to do that to you? Try to imagine a girl receiving that message to think to herself “oooo he seems nice” like?
Fair enough, he may not have known she was in a pretty serious lecture but that really is unfortunate timing.
Asking when someone is going to get with you is never a good idea
Advice for all the boys out there: asking a girl when you two are going to get it on means you two will NEVER get it on. We’re sorry, we don’t make the rules but really? Messages of that nature are the number one reason why girls will not even let you get close to a happy ending.
We have to give the guy some credit for being aware of his sexual health, no one enjoys a surprise STD as a souvenir from a one night stand. The chlamydia dig is an A* textbook Tinder response back at the cocky dm line, but he probably deserves it.
And that “100% infectious free boiiiii”? Enough said.
This one is just… gross
No one wants that mental image in their heads and they will definitely regret swiping right. What part of that pickup line will make a girl think: “you know what, he’s the one for me” (the correct answer is not one little bit of it).
The first line actually started out quite well but then took a massive dive off a steep cliff with the second line. If you wouldn’t say it in person, don’t send it on Tinder.
And if your downstairs is actually pumping PLEASE seek medical help from a doctor.
CV’s over Tinder?
An obvious copy and paste job and probably much like his actual CV – sent to hundreds of different people. Nevertheless, we like the creativity and those GCSE grades speak for themselves. He even included a skills and qualities section? nice touch.
They say dating is about selling yourself and boy, has this guy done that. But punctual, experience working in high pressured situations and outstanding communication skills – surely no man can possess all three?
So if you’re thinking about diving into the weird world of online dating and downloading that pink little Tinder app for yourself, these are the sort of messages you will most likely receive, compute and overcome (probably by blocking them ASAP).
Let’s not forget that over 39% of modern romances start online and we all know at least one miracle couple that met on Tinder and are now in a loving committed relationship. So there is definitely hope… keep swiping folks!