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Newcastle’s Maddest Fresher Nomination: Jack Beattie

Bet everyone in the crowd was PISSed off


Our next nomination comes from Geography student Jack Beattie, who clearly needs a lesson in spatial awareness.

Jack was in a club when he thought it would be an excellent idea to attempt to swing off a pipe over the crowd, resulting in said pipe snapping under his weight. The pipe was actually a sewage pipe which consequently sprayed piss over everyone in the immediate vicinity. Lovely.

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Escaping the club undiscovered by the bouncers like..

Jack's face was "covered in piss" but he was not deterred – he dumped his t-shirt in the toilet, borrowed his mate's jumper and carried on with the night as if nothing had happened. We can all agree that his spirit is nothing but admirable.

On what it would mean to win, Jack claims: "It would make having my t-shirt and jumper covered in piss worth it", a motive as pure as any. Furthermore, Jack, affectionately nicknamed 'Beattie' by his friends, is described by one of mates as "100 per cent the loosest cannon" he knows.