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35 things you should under no circumstances do at Newcastle University

Don’t walk up the stairs to the third floor of Armstrong building


Newcastle is undoubtedly the best university in the UK. But it's only going to be the best if you do it right.

If you're doing any of the following 35 things, you need to change your ways stat:

1. Go to Unicorn Fridays at the SU

Has anyone ever been?

2. Live anywhere but Jesmond or West Jesmond in second year

And third year while we're here…Sandyford and Heaton are nice but where's the Waitrose? Not to mention Osborne Road (the OR).

3. Believe someone when they say O2 is fun

Sorry kids, it's just not.

4. Order Diesel at Luthers

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It's literally grim.

5. Buy bottles of vodka or prosecco in the club

Who do you think you are???

6. Go to the Boohoo sale fair, unless you enjoy utter carnage

7. Tell everyone and everything you are a medic

Just stay in Marris and leave the medic chat there.

8. Go to the Geordie Shore clubs – they’re not as good as they're made out to be

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Hahhah Bijoux and Madame Koos.

9. Wear a puffer to the club

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Officially the first thing we ALL need to STOP wearing on a night out in Newcastle.

10. Use your debit card in Soho – they charge!

11. Say "I'll just get cash out in town", then be charged £2.50 to get anything out

12. Forget to buy a Metro ticket

You don't want to be fined for buying a child's ticket.

13. Assume when you move to West Jes you won't use the Metro

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Let's be honest you just will.

14. Underrate Mr Lynch – 2 for 1 cocktails on weekdays and a student discount is beaut.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BWSWkP_FPSN

It also closes at 2am, no brainer.

15. Wear heels on a night out in Newcastle

Unless you go to Northumbria, then please don't.

16. Pre in a bar, it'll end up more expensive than you think

17. Shop anywhere other than Aldi

18. Walk up the stairs to the third floor of Armstrong building

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When will it end?

19. Accept the accommodation offer if it’s for St Mary's

St Mary's: the accommodation you've never heard of

20. Be late for Swingers, and spend your night freezing to death

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21. Fall down the Soho stairs

We've all done it, this guy even broke his hands falling down those treacherous stairs.

22. Talk about your gap yah and wear hareem trousers in Leazes

We know you did a gap yeah, we get it. Please just leave those wavy garms at home.

23. Go to Soho unless you're really drunk

24. Wear an ironic outfit to a Jesmond S&M party, everyone else will be making an effort and laughing in your face

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This is no place for irony.

25. Lose all your shit and end up on Castle Leazes Exchange

‘Hahahah pls help, I’m such a mess lol legend’

26. Wear a bucket hat in the Robbo

Not socially acceptable.

27. Take your shoes off in the library if you don't have socks on

EW. Pls note the Robbo rules and etiquette.

28. Do your weekly shop at the corner shop

We love R&K's but it will cost you some dollar.

29. Be lured into having brunch at Arlos all the time, unless you have disposable income

Delicious, but so spenny.

30. Buy any food in the Robbo, ever

Not even delicious and still so spenny.

31. Sit on the third floor in the Robbo

That green is nauseating.

32. Buy cigs from the convenience store on the Bigg Market on a night out, unless you wanna pay £15

33. Wear AirMax to Popworld as they won't let you in

34. Go to Munchies while it's light outside

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Maybe on a hangover…

35. Assume going to the library will make you work

You deffo will just end up in the cafe being a social butterfly or go out for cig breaks constantly.

Photo credit: Aaron Shaquille Carlton (Swingers)