Every type of person that attends Newcastle Uni

After a solid year studying at Newcastle, I have definitely attained a good grasp on the types of people that attend Newcastle University. From the Sesh Head to the Try Hard, there are a few, lets say, ‘characters’ who come here. Some advice: stop reading now if you’re easily offended or in denial about which group you (sadly, but quite honestly) fit into.

The Sesh Head

They came to uni to party hard and party hard they do. The nightlife is clearly the sole reason they picked the Toon and they continue the freshers trend of making sure they're out every night all year round. You never actually see them at uni and so wonder how they've managed to get the 40% needed to be here, or how they got in in the first place. Armed with a litre bottle of own brand vodka, they’re the masters of necking and the drinking game whores. If you gave them £100 pounds, the decision on what to spend it on would be an easy one: 20 rounds of trebs and fair play. You only really see them on nights out and on social media, but, admittedly, they're usually the life and soul of the party.

Instagram: @kaatiegibson

The F***boy

Living, breathing head f***s. They f*** with your mind and your body, so buckle up and get ready for a rocky ride. They live to pull and will quite happily ditch friends to get lucky on a night out without a second thought. Good looking, gym addicted and a keen member of a sports team (most likely rugby), they have their super-likes at the ready on Tinder and their STD status is questionable. And why do they always study either sports science or some other sporty-educationy-not-really-a-proper-degree-kinda course? The F***boy can be found in the sports centre by day, or at the side of some club in Toon by night, eyeing up the girls and getting ready to choose their next victim. Their go-to method of communication is Snapchat and you both love and hate it when they pop up after months of nothing. You think you can change them and its whether you can hack the challenge or choose to tell them where to go.

The Northern Girl

Kitted out with a mini skirt, crop top and pair of 6 inch heels, the Northern Girl doesn't feel the cold. Well she secretly does, but chooses that her skimpy outfit is well worth the hyperthermia, so decides that spending the night freezing her tits off is a fair price to pay. Once a week she’ll spend a good few hours in Eldon Square or checking out the ‘New in’ section on Boohoo (most likely in a lecture) purchasing a new outfit for each night out, as she absolutely CANNOT wear the same thing twice. You can spot the Northern Girl a mile off, usually outside Bijoux stumbling around in her heels like Bambi on the streets of Newcastle, loudly spouting off in a deep northern tone, pissed and shivering her half-naked body away in the middle of winter.

The Rah

Privately educated and usually from some posh area down south, Newcastle wouldn't be the same without the Rahs. They're always one year older and the reason for that isn't resits (they haven't heard of anything below an A*) the reason is of course the gap yah, which generally involves Asia, elephants and A LOT of finding yourself. The Rahs have moved from Soho to Mono as they like to be surrounded by Rahs and only Rahs, they dread to think that any regular people will join their ranks. They wear vintage sportswear that costs them the average person's weekly rent but to them it's nothing, it also looks like nothing because they're trying to emulate homeless/gangster vibes. The Rahs can be found at Castle Leazes, Jesmond and Swingers, most likely dressed in a puffer jacket, trainers and culottes with a cig in hand. That siggy ring isn't fooling anyone.

The Try Hard

These are the machines who fire out answers before you've even had a chance to digest the question, and the constant voice you hear in every lecture, seminar, lab and workshop. They speak at just about every opportunity and have the work done before it's been set (well it has but of course you haven't looked on Blackboard in advance) . Irritating sometimes, but you have to admit that you rely on them to take on the impossible question which you haven't bothered listening to (catching up on social media is much more important, right?). You can't get a word in edgeways but you thank them for filling the perpetual silence when you're not on your best form so you don't have to.

The Promotor

At the ready with their snazzy jackets, wristbands, stamps and clipboards. The promoters, turned predators, lie in wait every Freshers' Week on Leazes path catching their bait as the poor innocent freshers walk by. Both the boys and girls are attractive and always have a pristine trim. Expect a dm off them weekly asking if you're heading out, tempting you with an endless guest list and shitty deals. You politely say you'll have a think or just simply ignore them because the honest answer is yeah I’ll be out but I’ll be going wherever I want.

Facebook: Danial Shafe

The Agric

Ah, the humble Newcatle agric (or not so humble…). These lot are as wild as they come and live and breath their Agriculture society. They arrive at Newcastle driving their Daddy's Land Rover and wearing their favourite Schoffel gilet. They roam around the city treating it like the estate they've grown up on and create havoc wherever they go. Agrics are fun tbf but loose as they come and only ever friends with other Agrics. To spot one of these in their natural habitat they like Flares and taking off their shirts. We don't always like the latter so much.

Waving their shirts to West Virginia, heaven help us

Photo credit: Eleanor Weitzer (Off the Record), Aaron Shaquille Carlton (Swingers)