Going on a sports tour is the best thing you’ll ever do

It’s like a holiday to Magaluf, but you all go to Uni

Uni Sports Teams are infamous for their Wednesday night socials, and we’ve all heard about the Fresher challenges (which obviously aren’t initiations). Tour is the best social you will ever go on; whether it’s Croatia or Spain, it’s a holiday with your team that you won’t forget.  Well, apart from that night that you just can’t remember.

From playing sport on the beach in the day, to tour team competitions and fresher challenges at night, it’s one competitive but amazing experience that you should not miss.

The 30 hour coach trip isn’t (that) bad

An outbound flight to Croatia probably costs the same as the entire week’s holiday, so the cheaper alternative of spending most of the week travelling across Europe by coach almost makes sense – you are on a student budget after all.

Besides, you can always drink to pass the time. Tour is one of the only places that it is acceptable to down a beer bong at 7 am before you’ve even set off. By lunch time you won’t even flinch when you hear it’s your turn for the funnel; at least you’re only having to do a cocktail of Guinness and Sambuca.

It’s hard to describe the bond you’ll have after thirty hours with your Sport’s Team, and the complete strangers from a nearby Uni. You’ve been through everything together; like the time when you all thought Martin had lost his passport, and that fall out when you were all a bit too pissed approaching Border Control. You’ve seen far too many people naked, and the game of ‘I Have Never’ means you know about everyone’s sex lives a little too well for you to think of each other as family, but certainly makes you fond of one another.

You’re representing your Uni in the best way you know: Fancy Dress

There’s nothing like a Uni fancy dress theme to show just how proud you are of your Uni. If you haven’t got TOON ARMY tattooed in eyeliner across your body, then do you even go to Newcastle? The most dedicated team outfit in 2016 has to go to Hull for the entire team sporting shlid haircuts all week.

You’ll realise that everything is said better when it’s chanted

Everyone gets a little lairy after a few drinks, but Tour brings lairy chants to a whole new level. The best teams can chant anything, and win any chant-off. (Sorry Swansea, but we rinsed you.)

For the best chants, preparation is key. Practice on the coach, or do a Sunderland and come prepared with a book of chants.

You’ll find so much fancy dress for next year’s socials

The fancy dress themes every night mean Tour nights out are for one thing only. Forget pulling or dancing, each night should be spent stealing as much fancy dress as is humanly possible. Hats, whistles, moustaches; everything you come back with will earn you points for your team at the end of the week. Granted, the other teams won’t like you for stealing their beloved costumes – but a challenge is a challenge.

By the end of the week your morals will be so low that you won’t know what’s acceptable to steal anymore. A Somberero? Yes. An iPhone? Nah, maybe not actually. If these props make it home, you’ll never need to buy an outfit for a social again. Good effort if the sombrero actually makes it back to England though.

It’s the best fun ever and you meet so many people

As well as getting to know everyone on your team, there are so many other teams and unis on Tour to meet too. There are 2500 of you on the resort after all. Everyone’s in the Tour bubble, where everyone’s shameless and the only thing that isn’t acceptable is sleeping in the day time. The challenges end up being hilarious (except when that guy swallowed a goldfish), and you’ll be chanting inappropriately all the way home.

Let’s face it, the only reason not to go on Tour, is you’ll be suffering from Tour Depression for months after.