What your festival choice says about you

Now that we’re in the depths of freshers and small talk including ‘what halls are you in?’, ‘where are you from?’ and ‘what are you studying?’ are starting to dry up, conversation can lead to more intimate and personal questions, such as ‘what did you do this summer?’.

Many will pull up their sleeve and proudly show off the band/bands that represent their taste in music and allegiance to a particular type of fun. Here’s a brief guide to what your festival choice says about you, also allowing you to judge new friends quickly, based on their wristband.

V Festival – Woop wooper

We all know the feeling, you’re dancing along to your favourite act and you hear that dreaded noise in your ear. It’s the woop woop. Even worse is when you find yourself inadvertently doing the same thing. Heard without fail at every act of this festival, if you like to woop, this one was for you.

Bestival – ‘Bate’-hovens

The looks of disgust thrown at the people leaving Elton John’s set were intense. I think I even heard someone shout ‘SCUM’ to which the person in the firing line rapidly replied ‘TOILET’. A festival filled to the brim with music connoisseurs, Bestival had an amazing line up this year and covered a huge range of music (including Bastille, Elton, Fatboy Slim, Snoop Dogg, James Blake and Eton Messy, to name very few).

Farr Festival – Rah-ver

Set in the woods of Hertfordshire, this 2,000 person boutique festival was, yes I’ll say it, edgy. The obligatory wave of ‘Ketamahne? Ketamahne?’ washed through the camp every night after the final act finished at 6am. An amazing lineup, great food and an intimate atmosphere all indicate that this festival won’t be kept a secret for long. Their slogans include ‘only tell your best friends’ and ‘let’s get lost in the woods’.

Leeds/Reading Festival – The Arsonist

If you have attended Leeds or Reading Festival – probably in your GCSE summer – it is likely that you have felt rowdy enough to set fire to a tent (checking someone isn’t inside it first of course, because that would just be a bit rude).

Glastonbury – For everyone except Wiley

With 177,000 descending on Glastonbury each year – making it the third most densely populated place in Britain at that time – it is hard to narrow it down. It is often said that Glastonbury is a mass of people longing for the good old days. Professor McKay said one who attends Glastonbury ‘may even have an organic allotment’. Nowadays though, it appears to be a festival everyone would love to attend – except for Wiley who tweeted the organisers: ‘fuck you and your farm’.

Found Festival – Essex born, tango’d, top-hat and dungaree wearing Shoreditch-resident wannabe

This was a heavy house, one-day event in the heart of Shoreditch. Heroin chic gone terribly wrong in many cases, there were some very interesting characters knocking around. Found made for cracking people watching. If you’ve got a pair of second-hand Doc Martens kicking about and are not averse to facial piercings, you’re all set for Found next year.