The rugby boys are looking for dates for the Rugby Club Dinner
Shout out to all the single ladies
Fifteen dashing lads from the rugby team have somehow found themseleves dateless for the rugby club end of year dinner. So if you are a beaut single lady who is available asap then have a peruse of what the rugby team has to offer.
Age – 21
Position – Fly Half
Charlie is an aspiring rugby player who is partial to a drrink but would rather spend an AU Wednesday tucked up in bed with his date watching The Notebook. You will probably recognise him as the worst barman in Revs where he’ll make good use of his staff card on first dates. Often confused with the England 7s player Cam Cowell, he’s very open to experimenting in the bedroom. However, Charlie prefers sexual positions where he is sitting up right, don’t be afraid to come up for air. Birmingham born and bred, with fashion sense as dapper as Tommy Shelby, is he the man for you?
Age – 19
Position – Assistant Coach (injured)
Ollie Norris has struggled to find a girl ever since he lost his leg brace. Renowned for snapchats, having unbelievable chat and dating older women (if that’s you than step right forward). If you don’t wanna come on a Chelsea away day than don’t bother.
Best lid in Fallowfield. President of the ginger society. Best 10 in UMRFC. Mr O’Donnell really is hot property. Good chat, Irish charm and a fantastic pair of arms. You may seem him as your average rugby boy at AU on a Wednesday, but he’d much prefer wining and dining a lucky lady at pizza express (don’t worry girls he’s paying). Although the second sexiest ginger in fallowfield (behind @rob cadge) he’ll still blow you away at the ball.
Position (s): scrum half and wing
This a package deal sorry. There is just no separating them. Here we have umrfc’s shortest member with their most eligible member. If if you appreciate a good bone structure – and don’t mind the undeniable chemistry between them then step right up.
IA 2nd year chemistry student and 3rd team captain in the rugby club. Loves a night out and has a wide music taste. Fun fact: he has a very questionable tattoo- and invites the lucky girl to come and see it for herself.
Position: Second Row
A second rate second row who enjoys long walks on the beach and a shameful night of lambrini and top floor factory. He’s looking for a nice girl to take to the ball so feel free to hit him up as what he lacks in fitness and rugby prowess, he makes up for in good looks and shit jokes
Position: 13/peak for Alfie
Guy Bradley’s chat is so bad he makes onion cries. Self-proclaimed best looking in UMRFC. However, don’t worry if things get awkward he’ll cut the tension with his jawline.
Bio: “gone but never forgotten”
Position: Fly half/prop/outside centre
The man’s known to have the second best side step in UMRFC. He managed 105 likes on his last insta (Yes he’s kinda a big deal), reinvented the wheel twice, solved 4 Rubix cubes simultaneously whilst blindfolded, able to drown fish, knocked out Anthony Joshua in the 1st round, lapped Mo Farah, nutmegged Jay Jay Okocha, bounced Jonah Lomu, and also played Varsity. He might pay for your ticket, or go halves.
Douglas McCraith (a.k.a Big Ballz Dougie). Pack leader of the mighty UMRFC 3s. Some say he has absolutely ginormous balls. However, even with all his accolades and top class chat, he has been unlucky in love and is willing to hear all offers for a date to the rugby ball. Looking for a lovely lady, “not too fussed about looks as long as she’s got those tittas”, he also enjoys long walks on the beach.
The ball is going to be a big one, and he wants someone whose down to get nuts!!!
Position: Utility back
Once described as a 6/10 for looks, chat and rugby skill. However our scouser promises a 10/10 night for his lucky date – though he cannot promise he’ll return with you – the man can’t be tamed!! Despite being a fresher…it’s safe to say…people know him.
Diagnosed ginger at birth. Closely resembles Chucky from Rugrats. Plays hooker for UMRFC and nearly scored a try one time. Knows literally everyone. Enjoys food, art and ice-skating, apart from the last two. Self-confessed legend. Pleads not-guilty to being boring. Has received rave reviews in the bedroom (supposedly).. Collects empty beer bottles (alcoholic). Can divide by zero. Is completely unable to swim in any way. Has been sober for 100 days, just not consecutively. Potential suitors are required to “grow up”
Position: winger(first team captain)
This one evening alone Alfie dudman Jones’s request for a night with the boys has been granted. If Arians are your thing then step right up for this thoroughbred. Love Tenerife then why don’t you just go swimming in his deep blue eyes. Also cooks a mean carbonara.
Besides looking great naked, Gareth prides himself on his brains, sporting a 100% record on Facebook photos that only the cleverest 3% of people can read, he’s one smart cookie. Seeking a lady who doesn’t mind wearing flat shoes but don’t worry he’s taller when he’s lying down.
Position: Back row
A limbless cold-blooded vertebrate animal with gills and fins living wholly in water. A real catch. We would have a whaley good time at the ball together, you don’t have to be a brain sturgeon to see why. Try not to fall for me hook, line and sinker. Don’t miss your oppor-tuna-ty to reel this one in. Not convinced yet? Need time to mullet over? Message me before salmon else beats you to it. If you can think of anymore fish puns then please don’t hesitate to let minnow
If any of these dashing lads catch your eye then make sure you show your interest. Act quick as we don’t think they’ll be dateless for long.