We spoke to dealers about the January ketamine drought

Every January of every year in all major ketamine consuming cities, a drought arises alongside a period of hardship and starvation for all ket heads across the country . Many theories as to how the ketamine drought occurs seem to circulate through our British cities, as our dealers have to give an explanation as to why their supplies have suddenly disappeared. To get to the bottom of this, The Tab spoke to some of the biggest players within the Manchester ketamine game, who all pretty much gave the same reason as to why the drug is scarce at the beginning of every year.

It’s a well known fact that most of the ketamine within the UK comes from India. This is bought in liquid measurements, such as Gallons or Litres. All real ket heads know that it has to be cooked from liquid – this is the form in which it is given to the horses. Often we can blame the anti-drug operations within the UK and India for these major droughts, which aren’t ever very predictable. But what about the yearly drought of every January? This seems to be some kind of a pattern, and I really wanted to get to the bottom of this.

I spent probably about half an hour in total in the back of three different rented BMW’s asking why the drug seems to disappear every January. The explanation was not what I expected at all.

By the end of the year, after Christmas, most drug consuming clientele are worn out and tired after a heavy year of sniffing and gurning. Most dealers find January the driest month and only make a fraction of their usual profit. So, what do all the ket importers do? Well, they go on holiday.

Yes that’s right … they all go on holiday and spend the hundreds of thousands they have made within the previous year. This is most convenient for them as this is when business is at its weakest anyway. This was confirmed by all three of the boys I spoke to about the January drought. Cheeky right? We can’t get our ket supplies because all the importers are out in Miami, The Bahamas, or Marbella spending what is effectively our money.

There isn’t a complete ket drought though as most of you will know instead, the ‘shardy’ ket (the good stuff) is replaced with ‘granules’. This is the synthetic British alternative, manufactured and distributed within the UK. This isn’t ideal, but it still does the job. Furthermore, there is also a shortage of good quality MDMA and pills for the same reasons.

So, do we congratulate and celebrate the holidays of these big time drug dealers? After all, they are responsible for great quality drugs within the other eleven months of the year. I mean, they have to have their fun to right? Drug dealing seems to be a 24/7 no days off kind of operation, and though the money may seem to be quick and easy, the risks of importing ketamine from foreign countries are very high. Personally, I think these guys deserve January off, and we should be grateful of there services throughout the rest of the year.