Watford Oceana is officially the fourth most tragic club in the country

In the biggest national nightclub poll ever, Oceana Watford has been voted the fourth most tragic of them all.

With a staggering 1,963 votes, Oceana in Watford has gained its spot as fourth most tragic hometown club in the UK.

Fuck the haters

Anyone who has visited the infamous ocies is unlikely to be surprised by these figures, as the nightlife in grotty watty is unapologetically tragic. The fact that two of it’s nearest neighbours Winkers and Batchwood also made the top five says it all.

It’s hard to say what keeps drawing people back to Oceana. We certainly wouldn’t be seen dead in a club like this at uni, but I guess we just can’t help but crave the nostalgia brought on by the obscene daggering in the Barcelona room.

It’s the only place we want to reunite with our pals when we’re home from uni for the holidays. The queues and lovely scent bring back fond memories of arriving at 10.30pm to sneak in underage through WooWoo and we now feel a sense of superiority at rocking up at midnight with no fear. Although, we do have to question our morals when we remember we will have to pay £10 for entry on a student night, maybe it’s time we stopped doing this.

We’re old enough and wise enough now to steer clear of the VIP room – where you’ll find overeager estate agents blowing a week’s wages on a bottle of Veuve to impress the sixth formers who are pretty enough to get the wristband. I think we’d rather pay £10 for a double than spend half our night chatting to Gary and Dean from accounting anyway.

So it might be the fourth most tragic club in the country, but that won’t stop us going there “ironically” to get pissed and embarrass ourselves in front of everyone we know. Certainly not in the near future anyway.