I went for a date on my own to Chicken King

I didn’t have sex, but the chicken was nice


It’s hard to escape Valentine’s today when it comes around. The Pizza Expresses and Cafe Rouges of the country heaving with smug couples handing each other naff flowers and staring into each others’ eyes. There’s this little place just on Wilmslow Road called Chicken King that’s more used to a couple of drunk twats than couples though. So I decided to go on Valentine’s evening, dressed in the outfit I had picked months before for this day (just in case I did get a boyfriend) with my favourite wine, Sainsbury’s Malbec.

This night was just about me and my loves: chicken and wine.

My pulling outfit

Thanks for the flowers hun

It was no surprise, the restaurant was empty. However, this might have been good for pride that was slowly vanishing with each bite.

The chicken man was accommodating and even good company, sadly he wasn’t single.

Despite my poor attempt to pull the chicken man, he did take pictures of me so I could remember this tragic day forever. However, I would have assumed he would have given me free food given the fact I am a loyal customer and it was a holiday.

As I sat and ate, my sandwich I can’t lie that as people walked by I attempted to hide myself behind the flowers that I had bought for myself. My rationale was that a past hook up could have walked by, and I don’t think I have enough pride to deal with that kind of social disaster.

So although I didn’t have sex on Valentine’s, I guess the chicken was a nice substitute.

And this photo is exactly why I am single, on a day like Valentines.

After thinking back on this experience and past hook ups and dates I realized that I could always count on Chicken King because time and time it as fulfilled my needs more than any boy in Fallowfield has.