It’s official! We are the fittest uni in Manchester
Glory for ‘Uni of’ as Man Met fail at yet another aspect of life
Manchester University has swiped the crown in the ‘who is the fittest?’ competition.
We’re better at pretty much everything, and now we’ve officially pipped the poly to the post as the buffest uni in Manchester.
The chiselled-jawed boys of Manchester stormed to victory in The Tab’s vote last week.
And here’s a scientific breakdown of the win:
We scooped a huge 81% of the vote in last week’s poll, while it was an embarrassing defeat for MMU who only managed to rack up 126 votes.
So we’re not only just academically superior, we’re now officially physically superior too. And it’s hardly surprising with the likes of Markus, Merlin and Stefan on our side.
So it was unlucky for these boys:
Don’t lie, you defo wanted to be a Newsround presenter growing up
The uni is also exploring the idea of offering a degree to ‘someone off Love Island’ to ‘balance it out’
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The protest left Owens Park and marched towards Oxford Road
The conference is run by UoM students and supports charities MASH and Care4Calais
We spoke to four young Ukrainians about their personal experience with the ongoing war
At least seven cars’ worth of donations have been gathered so far
‘We felt a little crazy with our candles and the Cars soundtrack playing over a Bluetooth speaker’
‘Academics are financially, physically and mentally stressed’
‘He always wanted to make people happy and laugh’
We’re holding an open meeting this Friday at 5pm in the University of Manchester SU
‘The fight against pay inequality needs the support of every student’
We all know Manc’s nightlife is better than Leeds and cheaper than London but which club is students’ favourite?
The money is being given to Papyrus, a charity for the prevention of young suicide
‘When I saw it I had a little cry, I wouldn’t expect this here’
Hundreds took part and marched through Manchester city centre
Hundreds of people marched through Manchester against the proposed policing bill
It seems Manc students just can’t get enough of chicken, kebabs and everything in between
The marking and assessment boycott was due to start on Monday
Rich, talented and successful? Will never be me
With no eliminations and not a weak queen in the batch, this is truly a celebration of drag
Kane has a huge painting of his own face, and I think that’s all I need to say
The University of Bristol has been ordered to pay £50k in damages
Too many people accidentally selling worn pants for my liking
Legendary Legend Stars want what RuPeter Badges has
I haven’t stopped crying over the deeper meaning behind Matilda
This comes after the government cut ties with the union over these allegations
Only homemade salads and tap water for me now thanks
I love this album more than I love myself
He brushes off the case in a chat with Anna, but it turns out it’s worth tens of millions
Of course Viktor Krum had a glow up 🔥
The uni’s UCU claims staff at an Australian consultancy may be used to grade student essays
‘I made a mistake… I’m listening’
I want to live in a world where Jamie Lee Curtis has hotdogs for fingers
Starting to regret my life choices
They said it was ‘company policy’ because ginger people have ‘demonic energy’
Derry Girls will never die x
Happy Wayne Rooney court drawing day, to those who celebrate