Election day: Let’s talk about Count Binface’s London Mayor campaign
He’s the ‘LORD BUCKETHEAD YOU’RE LOOKING FOR’, apparently
Count Binface, formerly Lord Buckethead, is one of many amusing, if not entirely unexpected, candidates in the London Mayoral Election Campaign which ends today. (Go vote!)
The Count however, unlike YouTubers Max Fosh and Niko Omilana, or actor Laurence Fox, has a history of running in political elections and, despite being a self-declared “intergalactic space warrior”, hasn’t been entirely unsuccessful – he won a whole 69 votes when running against Boris in 2019.
Count Binface’s election campaign this time round, however, is undeniably a work of art. Look no further than his campaign song “Hip to be Mayor!”, strangely reminiscent of Huey Lewis and The News’ “Hip to be Square”, and his satirical but concerningly astute manifesto.
His campaign page reads: “I AM THE LORD BUCKETHEAD YOU’RE LOOKING FOR. I’m the intergalactic space warrior who stood against Theresa May in 2017 and went viral (in a non-Covid way). Then in 2018 I had an unfortunate battle on the planet Copyright, when an elderly American human film producer took my Twitter account off me after I got famous.
“So I had an upgrade and took in Boris Johnson in the 2019 election in my new and improved form, Count Binface. I’m still your friendly neighbourhood space warrior campaigning for justice, lasers, Lovejoy and the return of Ceefax. AND I’M BACK FOR THE 2021 ELECTION. MAY THE SIXTH BE WITH YOU!”
His 2021 Manifesto includes, but is not exclusive to:
- London Bridge to be renamed after Phoebe Waller.
- London to join the EU.
- On one day every year, escalators on the Underground to be reversed, encouraging travellers to go up the down escalators and down the up ones, as a free gym and Gladiators simulator all in one.
- No shop to be allowed to sell a croissant for more than £1.
- The Royal Family to keep one of Buckingham Palace, Kensington Palace, St James’ Palace and Clarence House, with the rest gifted to the nation to help eradicate homelessness. If the royals complain that one palace isn’t enough, they will be forced to buy Crystal Palace FC.
- All government ministers’ pay, including the mayor’s, to be tied to that of nurses for the next 100 years.
You can read the full thing here.
Count Binface, whose alter ego is Jon Harvey, writer and comedian, runs these campaigns in order to raise awareness of homelessness and raise money for Shelter.
“Homelessness is an issue that’s close to my internal fluid pumping organ. In the 21st century it is indefensible that a wealthy nation like the UK should allow people to sleep rough on the streets. It’s just not good enough.
“Finland has worked hard to eradicate homelessness and London should do the same. There is a ludicrous number of properties owned by the rich minority and which are left empty for lots of the time, while other people have nothing. If an alien came down to Earth and saw this they’d say it’s a disgrace. Well I am that alien. It’s a disgrace.”
This year Count Binface has decided to let his political ambitions be tempered by the generosity of the public. He has promised that dependent on how much his “Count Binface for London Mayor 2021” GoFundMe page raises, he will either stand for a constituency member in the Greater London Authority (GLA) if over £1000 is raised, as a London-wide candidate in the GLA if over £5000 is raised, or for London Mayor itself if the deposit of £10,000 is raised.
He promised fans that if any excess money was raised between these targets it would be donated to the charity Shelter, as his campaign “is non-profit and aims to raise awareness of homelessness”.
Binface fan or not, go get involved with the tapestry of characters, human and alien alike, that make up the shambles that is the London Mayor election, and use your vote!
Image Credit: Count Binface via Youtube.