Protesters blast penny-pinching Provost’s £360K salary with “payday party”

Moneybags Michael Arthur has already earned a UCL cleaner’s salary this year


Ballsy activists protested outside the Provost’s office against his eye-watering six-figure salary this afternoon. 

Around 30 lefty BNOCs protesting against the colossal pay gap between senior management and maintenance staff held a banner that read “The Provost earns a cleaner’s salary every 19 days!”

Leaflets distributed by Union officials and Defend Education activists said the £30,000 Michael Arthur has already earned in 2015 deserved “celebration”.

A rep from the lecturers’ union, UCU, delivered a speech about inequality in the university’s payment structure.

The union’s External Affairs & Campaigns Officer, Omar Raii, who was at the protest, claimed Michael Arthur and his exorbitant salary represents the “increased corporatisation of UCL”.

“Any idea that there isn’t enough money is laughable when you look at senior management’s pay.”

Moustachioed Swedish heartthrob David Dahlborn said: “The really awful thing about this is that he gets paid to keep down the pay of the really important staff, like cleaners, security guards and teaching assistants.”

“As their pay goes down, his goes up.”

“This inequality is the most inhumane aspect of it, the fact that he thinks he’s worth more than the rest of us.”

People’s legend David Dahlborn