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If the Friends characters were at the University of Liverpool, this is what they’d be like

Nobody wants to be the Ross of the group

So no-one told you uni was gonna be this way: your degree's a joke, you're broke, your love life's DOA. So when it hasn't been your day, your week, your month or even your (academic) year, read here and find out what the Friends characters would be like if they were in your shoes.


The inevitable clean freak of the group, they are bound to make you feel uncomfortable over one plate being left in the sink. Good luck trying to find your second year Smithdown abode with Monica, none of them will be sterile enough or have the right ambience for this nitpicker. You know she has a good heart really, but you just can't afford a Luxury Student Home as she expects.


Yes we get it, you do a "real" subject and have the joy of rubbing it in that you'll be a of "doctor" by the end of it; just don't make us sound silly. The only people who care is everyone else in the Harold Cohen.

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Joey doesn't share takeaway food


Even though his breath always smells of Harper's kebabs and his room is full of leftover pizza and used condoms, he always seems to pull after a night in The Raz. He just manages to whip out the charm (and the fat frogs) at the right moment.


The inevitable fashion-forward friend, yeah you may be more committed to your winged eyeliner than your media degree, but at least your pals love you when they can borrow your clothes for a Juicy night-out.

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Rachel would be all over celebrity appearances


The joker of the group that uses endless sarcasm to mask the fact their accountancy degree is so. fucking. boring.


The quirky one of the squad, she's definitely studying philosophy and cycles to lectures over hopping on an Arriva. Don't even suggest McDonalds on your trip to town, she's already lined up the coolest vegetarian food on Bold Street. And they always seem to find something good at the kilo sale. If only you knew her ways.

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Phoebe once she learnt to ride a bike


The guy who really wants to be in your group, but just doesn't quite fit in. At least he'll make a nice cuppa when he invites himself to your Crown Place flat again (don't you live in Philharmonic? Stay away).


Your mate's regrettable one-night stand from freshers, they're not as bad as your friend claims, but you still happen to see them everywhere: the 699 to uni, Smithdown Aldi, Quids In. They're as unavoidable as deadlines.


The most inoffensive law student who probably spends their summer volunteering in Africa, you can't quite understand how your mate got with him given all the fuckboys she's managed to attract in the past.

Mike always gets the best spots in the library, obviously


They ain't even there most the time, but they seem to turn up at the most inconvenient moment. The night before your exam? You bet. Moments before you're about to head out to SoulJam? Piss off David, you may be sweet but I couldn't care less about what you're doing in your physics labs.


The pet you're not really allowed in your Langdale crib. Hopefully you can hide him during your landlord's surprise visit.

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Somehow, coming up north means they've exaggerated their Surrey accent even more. Tone it down, Rach…Emily. EMILY.


The girlfriend that was way too good for your mate anyway. You knew it was never gonna last; she's hot, smart and always held a torch for her ex at Oxford.

Jack and Judy

The parents of your housemate that just make you feel incredibly awkward every time they visit. Why do they have to come to Melville every other week? Just go back home to Manchester.

"Lads lads lads" is Pete's motto


Loaded and thinks he's tougher than he is, you'll catch him after rugby socials or AU night fighting half the people in Concert Square.


You're dumbfounded as to how they got into a Russell Group uni, but being a hit with the ladies is more important than academia anyway, right?

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Frank Jr

Your baby-faced roomie that managed to pull an older girl on a Saturday night in Black Rabbit, and boy do you know it.


The suave mature student that drinks whisky at pres and has all your guests swooning, especially when half your guy mates can't even grow a feeble moustache.