Thirteen things Liverpool students fear more than Halloween

That’s right guys, it’s that time again. Brace yourselves for the onslaught of cat ears, sugar skulls and copious amounts of fake blood, because Halloween commeth. Students will line the streets in their spookiest attire, but I guarantee none of your costumes will be as scary as the following.

Debt

Is there anything as scary as starting your adult life 50K in debt and knowing that one in ten of your hard-earned pennies will slip straight through your fingers and right back into the SLC’s pockets?

I’VE. GOT. NOTHING. LEFT.

Living in that ground floor bedroom

Rumour has it, you’re most likely to get robbed.

Group Projects 

Name three words more stressful than ‘assessed group project’. I’ll wait. It doesn’t matter how proactive you are. You can make as many group chats and work plans as you want, but you know there’ll be that one group member who won’t pull their weight. So, you’ll live in fear until they finally send you their pathetic contribution the night before the deadline and then you’ll live in further fear that you won’t be able to re-write their work overnight.

Having a lecture in the Cypress building

You officially voted it the worst building on campus and there’s a reason for that – this cold dingy monstrosity of a building would be the perfect place for some kind of abandoned house Halloween event. It is not however the perfect place for your lecture on Postcolonial Literature.

Looking at your bank balance after Brooklyn Mixer Monday

You know about the Tuesday morning fear – you can’t say no to a £3 double vodka, or eight. Your overdraft weeps.

Library Fines

You spent the summer either drunk, abroad, working or all perhaps all three. Perhaps you also took out ten books from the library back in May and forgot to renew them over the summer. Perhaps, you’ve now been denied access to the library because you owe £92 in library fines and PERHAPS you’re now crying in Smithdown Asda because you’ve had to swap your usual Frosties for budget bran. Scary stuff.

9ams on a Wednesday

It’s almost as if the Liverpool timetable guys don’t know that you like to spend your Tuesday nights at Juicy full of Vodka, dancing to Beyonce’s early work. You’re always going to be full of regret on a Wednesday and the 9am that follows is a prospect too scary to even consider.

No 9am’s being made here

The queue for the 699

It’s been a long day, you made it to your 9am, you’ve even put in a couple of hours at the library and you’re now going to reward yourself by getting the 699 home and taking a well earned break (probably involving Netflix and a snack). But as you approach Uni Square the queue before you is unbareable and you’re going to be standing in the rain for at least 25 minutes – horrifying.

Should be called the 666 tbh

The approach to third year

You may know it as the ‘Third Year Freakout’ or perhaps as a ‘Quarter Life Crisis’, either way, third year is scary. What, with the relentless deadlines, masters applications, CV builders, oh, and that little thing called a dissertation, who wouldn’t be scared? Graduate life looms and there’s nothing more fear-inspiring than trying to adult.

Turnitin

Fear is that feeling you get at 3:52pm when Turnitin has crashed and your deadline is at 4pm.

The Sydney Jones basement 

Has your lecturer asked you to do some obscure reading? If yes, then the odds are that you’ll be venturing down into the cold, dark and mouldy SJ basement – the place where old books go to die. But, beware! Don’t venture down there at night unless you’re filming an episode of Ghost Hunters.

Going to the loo in the Harold Cohen

Don’t even enter the loos without your own supply of loo roll, because, believe me, you will be caught short. Forget about your ghost costumes, an empty loo roll dispenser is where the fear’s at.

Concert Square on Halloween

Never been to Concert Square on Halloween? Don’t even try. The queues are so long that even your most steaming friend will be sober by the time they get into a club. Wasting alcohol is scary. Plan a house party or pre-book an event – you’ll thank us later.