Jeremy Corbyn visits the Guild drinking game

Why else do you think the Guild has a bar?

Corbyn guild jeremy corbyn Labour Labour Party

The imminent visit of Jeremy Corbyn to the Guild provides an excellent excuse to get absolutely shitfaced, so here’s how to make half an hour of political discussion more enjoyable.

Don’t get too rowdy though, or you may find yourself on the wrong end of that withering side-eye.

  • Drink one finger every time Corbyn claims to make money appear out of thin air.  Do the same if anyone tries to ask him the question “where will the money come from?”.
  • Drink one finger every time he mentions his portrayal in the media (two fingers if the phrase Murdoch Media is used).
  • Drink two fingers whenever the immigration crisis is mentioned.
  • Drink three fingers whenever NHS cuts are mentioned. Do the same if the Medics turn out in force over the junior doctors dispute.
  • Down your drink if Jeremy manages to shut down a student asking “WHERE WILL WE GET THE MONEY.”
  • Guild beer drinking game
  • Shot of vodka (preferably the cheapest you can find) every time austerity is mentioned.
  • Whenever he mentions a 60 per cent rate of income tax, whoever has the most liquid left in their glass pours 60 per cent of it into the drink of the person with the least, who must then proceed to down it.
  • GO NUCLEAR – snort some salt, smash back a tequila shot and squirt a lemon in your eye every time he mentions getting rid of the Trident Nuclear weapons program. For added realism have a tub of Toxic Waste at the ready for that post-nuclear sourness.
  • Shot of vodka, preferably the cheapest you can find, every time austerity is mentioned.
  • Down your drink and clap profusely whenever he mentions the abolition of tuition fees.
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  • Shot of Red Aftershock (or just any red drink you can find) whenever the Labour campaigners around him start to clap or nod in approval at what Corbyn has said. These people will likely be wearing a lot of red and will show their loud vocal support at everything JC has to say.
  • Look witheringly at your Tory mate as you authoritatively down your drink every time he gives his amazing side-eye.
  • Hum the Venezuelan national anthem through your nose, whilst drinking until you finish whenever he mentions foreign policy.
  • Keep a bag of pork scratchings handy for any allusions to what the PM may or may not have done. If the subject is brought up then place one in a vodka shot and down them together.  Tasty.  This can also be done at anytime the phrase “Tory scum” or “Tory pigs is used or implied.