How to dress like a top LAD

Are you sick to death of being a mediocre male species? Can’t keep up with the BARE JOKES and can’t down a pint in 5 seconds? Well don’t you fret – we are here to give you the ultimate ‘top lad’ wardrobe to get you at least 72% of the way there.


Holiday season is coming and all eyes are looking out for those ultimate lads. Fear not sub-standard gentleman, out of the kindness of our fashion-aware hearts we have compiled a collection of tips/looks that are guaranteed to earn you copious amounts of #LAD points.

Meet Adam, The Tab Liverpool’s Opinion editor, better known as ‘The Payne Train’ and our newly turned top lad.

Adam previously led his life as merely a customary, common folk gent – but without the misogynistic t-shirts and ‘tache-on’ snapbacks how on EARTH was he going to hunt all those munters on his summer trip to Shagaluff?

Normal #LAD

The Tab fashion girls quickly stepped in to ensure his success rate would be at its peak. After our intervention he only needed to learn how to drink his own piss and/or vomit then behold, we have a brand new LAD LAD LAD.

Presenting the top #LAD wardrobe

Innocent #LAD

According to top lads, we females just love to see some flesh, in fact the more bare skin exposure the better! While they may channel Take That circa 98 and be typically nic-named as ‘wife-beaters’, this vest has cute, pastal floral patterns suggesting he’s a bit more innocent and he’s not going to try and mount you at the nearest opportunity.

You’re fucking getting it #LAD

What you see is what you get. It’s written on the tin. This lad just sees his next female conquest and she immediately knows it’s GAME ON. Either play it or peg it ladies ’cause this lad has got gaaaaaame.

Patriotic #LAD

Now, what is more sexy and appealing than having a half naked, legs apart, lips puckered girl sprawled accross a male’s t-shirt? Heaven forbid she didn’t have her Union Jack frenchies on or we would deem this picture quite innapropriate. Long live the Queen #LAD.

MAGA 2K14 #LAD

It just wouldn’t be a top #LAD wardrobe without a bit of neon thrown in there. As soon as the girls catch a glimpse of these luminous green short shorts it’s quite literally a case of moths to a flame. (Obviously the Christmas socks are a well-thought out and crucial addition to this outfit).

All about that hype #LAD

Here we have another #LAD outfit that has reached misogynistic maturity. What better way to pull girls than by presenting to her a reminder that she hasn’t quite reached that bikini bod she has been aiming for? Hey girl, back to the gym girl.

All on that green, me #LAD

Many, many thanks to our newly turned top lad Adam for helping us show that all it really takes to realise your #LAD potential is a new wardrobe.

 

For more satirical fashion fun, follow @tablivfashion on Twitter.