ATB lose momentum

The boys are stopped in their tracks following a shocking 2-0 loss.


It’s been a mixed month for the Boys: after a superb early run (seeing 13 goals scored with no reply in five games), this has sadly been cut short as the misleadingly named FC Pathletico left us high and dry in a 2-0 defeat.

It had all started so well. Our 3-0 victory against the talented (if unimaginative) FC Smithdown had indicated we’d be challenging the top of the table this season. This belief was fuelled by a 5-0 pounding of ‘Dale Madrid’, which saw our Polish number 9 continue his good form with a hat-trick, Jonny ‘stay player’ Brown bag a goal as well as a couple of assists, and even saw Sam ‘star striker’ Brown score a phenomenal volley.

Our Polish number 9 with the match ball

However, this optimism was somewhat diminished when we turned up the following week to find our opposition hadn’t turned up and so we’d be playing a friendly against a group of fairly angry scousers.

The score-line was too painful to remember or even bear repeating but it’s fair to say we had our arses handed to us.

The performance wasn’t without merit though. Patrick ‘rocket shot’ Atherton effectively proved the laws of probability with a thunder bolt of a goal (that usually would have ballooned into the atmosphere and taken out the International Space Station). Elsewhere, ‘Old Man’ Obi defied his years to bag a few goals while Sawko continued his scoring form.

This game could have had the positive effect of bringing us back to earth without losing any points. Unfortunately this didn’t prove to be the case.

Our game against FC Pathetico got off to a terrible start when a (frankly crap) shot rebounded off the back wall to hit your gangly goalie’s limb and end up in our goal.

This humiliating goal also ended ATB’s run of clean sheets in competitive fixtures that had seen some (me) call your reporter ‘the best keeper in the league’.

Outfield the Boss was trying a controversial rolling sub approach which angered top striker and top diva Sawko.

Top ‘knot-che’ attacker

FC Pathetico did live up to their name in terms of sportsmanship. One particular player had the nerve to hack away at Jonny ‘top-knot tosser’ Brown to the extent that a fight nearly broke out. Obviously we intervened before our very own man mountain beat the opponent to death with a flick of his top-knot.

A second goal we should have saved sealed the deal in an underwhelming game. With the Boys still third all is not lost, but the Boss will be looking for some ‘bouncebackability’ in the next game.

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