ATB FC season preview

With the campus league season about to kick off the Boys are looking to build on our first season finish of 10th. Some say that mid-table anonymity is nothing to be proud of but after a first half of the season that saw copious amounts of goals go through your reporters’ gangly legs we were delighted to have finished in the top half.

Our Club Chairman, Manager, Head Coach, Captain and all round hero Martin ‘the Boss’ Maticevic is looking to avoid the ‘2nd season syndrome’ that has seen off other high flying new teams such ‘Crystal Phallus’ and ‘Enter Me Nan’ (although with names like that you’re winners whatever the result).

Sawko paying the price for a life of excess

Yet some players seem to have let their new-found fame and success get to their head over summer. Our Polish no.9 Adam Sawko had his jaw broken in a seedy nightclub. This did turn out to be a positive though as eating through a straw helped him shift the 2 stone our greedy game-changer put on while living a life of excess.
Elsewhere the Boss was head-butted in a nut-and-run incident leaving him with a fat lip and a burning desire for revenge.

The boss is on a quest for vengeance

The transfer season was a poor one for the Boys with Head Scout Maticevic unable to attract talent while Jonny ‘Villainous Traitor’ Brown doesn’t look like he’ll be playing as much this season on account playing for the proper football team.

Moreover it looks like Old Man Obi is finally hanging up his boots at the ripe age of 27. However the Boss is working on the mercurial Mancunian to have a Scholes-esque return from retirement.

Traitorous villain, Jonny Brown

Despite the loss of some talent the season ahead looks bright. The solid defensive pairing of Patrick ‘Athletic’ Atherton and Sam ‘The Rock’ Butler is still intact to protect their clumsy keeper.

In midfield the enigmatic talent that is ‘G’ looks to be returning from his punctured lung injury and Ewan ‘Duracell Bunny’ Powell will be as unrelenting as ever.

A lack of pre-season games means fitness will be low but our experienced team hope we can push for a top 4 finish this year to attract top European talent.

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