How to Pull at AU

The end of the year is drawing closer, and the AUs left are few and far between.  You’d think after all this practice you’d have cracked how to bag a good’un, but you still end up being left in Revs at 3am with all the desperados.

Despite being a guaranteed pick up joint, it still takes some leg work to pull someone half decent at AU.  But never fear, The Tab tells you how to avoid these situations and have the night of your life with that dream boat.

1. Be wary of your beer goggles; they really don’t help in these sorts of situations.  That said, no one can survive AU without copious amounts of alcohol.  We recommend the motto ‘drunk not crunk’.  That way, standards have a better chance of staying in tact.

Hands up who’s had too many VKs

2. Don’t cave in Walkabout.  You may be really on it, but don’t pull in Walkabout.  Walkabout is for eyeing the talent, not becoming THAT girl who hops into someone’s bed at 11pm.

3. Choose your floor carefully.  Downstairs in Revs is undoubtedly better, but you either go hard or go home.  Upstairs is for the more reserved, sophisticated sports.  Rarely does one meet a cricket player getting down and dirty with the ‘lads’ on the bottom floor.

The difference between downstairs and upstairs is a bit like the difference between Carnatic and Greenbank

4. Watch out for the roamers.  At intervals during the night, groups of lads will split up to go ‘roaming’ solo on the hunt for easy prey.  You will be picked up if you:

• Walk to the loo in a group of three or less
• Get separated from everyone queuing at the bar
• Lose everyone in the black hole of a dance floor

Stay cool and avoid looking like a lost puppy so you’re not spotted by the lurkers.

Bigger groups will deter the roamer. Stay smart girls.

5. Avoid dancing next to walls and pillars.  This makes it easier for ‘top lads’ to ‘pull’ you by ramming you against said wall and start eating your face.  Definitely a situation that can only be stopped with full on martial arts once it’s started.  Don’t ever dance next to these.

Clearly not impressed with who he’s been left with. I repeat, ‘drunk not crunk’.

Follow these simple rules and you should be able to sort the sublime from the grime.  It might be AU, but you still have to wake up next to them in the morning.

AU tickets for March 6th are on sale from the Sports Centre now.

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