A definitive list of things you will experience in the run up to Christmas break

Prepare for a chaos that will rival that of you and your uncle over the Queen’s Christmas speech

With the Christmas holidays fast approaching, students across the UK are preparing to make the jump from uni halls to home – thanks Boris for the early move, we love having class time cut short.

Moving back to your small town can be a problematic process, as many second and third years may already know. You have big plans to see friends (that’s if you’re one of the lucky few who escaped the clutches of Tier 3 – I’m looking at you, London) or perhaps, now more than ever, you just want a good old catch up with your family whilst you binge the crap TV you daren’t watch at uni in fear of being judged – it’s okay, I will be watching Five Gold Rings with my mum as soon as I’m back too.

But before we return to the safety of three-square meals a day and free laundry (up yours Circuit) there is the gruelling experience of, ‘the final week’. I’ve tried to be as optimistic as possible but honestly, you should prepare yourself for the most hectic week since you moved to uni.

via @thetablincoln_

Gordon Ramsey, turn away now

Having only a week left, there’s little doubt in my mind that you will have zero fresh food stored in your kitchen. Nope, not even the reliable mum friend will be able to lend you a spare slice of bread for toast. It’s a fight for the last teabag of the year, and you’re googling how to make a meal out of a slice of cheese, mouldy apples and vinegar.

Work? At Christmas??

This year may be different, but the thought of lugging all of your notes home to revise for exams / finish your assignment makes you want to cry. Trust me, you think you’ve cried all your tears for 2020? Wait until you realise you left that one notebook back in your halls.

As for your plants…

Or – at least – those that have somehow survived the first semester, where will they go during the winter break? Some less experienced plant mums may drown their last £5 succulent in the hopes that it will tide them over until the new year; those who have managed to keep all of their plants intact are currently negotiating with their parents the strategies for transporting these precious cargo home. And of course, there are those who will simply accept that plants aren’t really their thing and throw out the shrivelled carcasses with the rest of the questionable rubbish that we all accumulate over the year.

I actually have to pack

This may seem obvious at first, but if you’re anything like me then you will have been telling yourself not to worry just yet, after all, “I have the whole week to pack”. Suddenly it’s 4am on a Sunday and you’re pouring your drawers into as many suitcases as you can find. Honestly, do yourself a favour and start packing now (SIDE NOTE: please separate your laundry from your clean clothes, it’s gross).

Hopefully, this small insight into the last week of uni can act as some kind of guide for those who are yet to experience this slightly crazy time of year. Or at the very least, you can laugh at yourself (as I do) as the tears pour down your face whilst you shove your socks into any leftover space in your suitcases after you forgot to pack them in the first time around.

Have a Merry Christmas!

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