At least one of these nightmares will happen to you in Lincoln Uni halls

We all have that ONE flatmate

4 years ago

It’s that time of the year where freshers have now made their way to Lincoln, full of high expectations of living in halls starting off their university journey.

If you’re living in Cygnet Wharf, Lincoln Courts, or any other halls of residence, it’s invevitable that you’ll face a few problems on the way. Whether it’s getting used to living on your own or a fight with your flatmates, every fresher goes through it.

So this is what you can expect from your new home this year:

Nights out (if we can have any)

I don’t think any night out goes smoothly, and if it did, it wouldn’t be any fun, would it? In the good old days, you’d likely drag your flat to Quack, and now it’s probably just going to be to the Slug & Lettuce. You will probably get a mate who spews on your new shoes or tries to jump in the Brayford, ‘to swim with the swans’. There may even be a trip to A&E, at least you’ll find out where the hospital is.

Circuit Laundry

As if moving to uni wasn’t expensive enough, Circuit Laundry is about to become the bane of your halls experience. Being charged £2.80 for a single wash is a bit steep if you ask me, I’ve got some VKs to buy! Not only that but you’ll probably find somebody’s crusty pants they’ve left behind too or a lone sock that just stays there… for MONTHS.

The “flat thief”

You may notice that you’ve been using a lot more milk than you thought, or so you think. Every flat has someone who thinks it’s okay to pinch a bit of everybody’s food and get away with it. Don’t get me started on biscuits either, you’ll think you have about 10 or so digestives left and then there’s two left and you’re off to Morrison’s to buy more. Where did they go? Will you ever find out? Probably not, but you’ll have your suspicions. And don’t think you’ll have a full set of cutlery by the end of the year either.

Fire alarms

I want to know whose idea it was to decide to do a fire practice at 6am, fire alarms will be set off at all hours. So be expected to be woken up abruptly. And if it’s not you, you’ll have a flatmate who manages to chargrill all of their food and being guilty of setting the fire alarm off once a week.

That one eccentric flatmate

Weird maybe a better word to use but we’re all going to have a flatmate who is slightly silent and you never know where they are, but you’ll find them going all out for Halloween and that’ll be the last time you see them until the next term. Maybe kicking your door down at 3am (true story) or bringing a dead bird in the flat after a night out (also a true story) you’ve just got to be a bit cautious of them because, after a few cocktails in them, you never know how the night is going to end up.

Flat fallouts

A clash with the cleaning rota or late-night partying, you’ll most likely have a disagreement with your flatmates at some point. Just make sure you take the bins out from time to time. You may end up not talking to them ever again, just make sure you don’t sign a housing agreement with them for next year.

Getting lost

We’ve all been there, all the corridors look the same. Don’t get me started on the Minerva building, it’s like a fortress that you will never work out how much time you have to get there and find your seminar room. And there’s nothing worse than walking into a seminar late, all those eyes looking to you, judging you because they gave themselves 30 minutes to work out the maze that is the Minerva building.