Here are the seven totems of Lincoln, Joe Goldberg style

Not quite coyotes and burning palm trees…

Season two of ‘You’ aired back in December, and we devoured it in days, loving every moment. Season three has recently been confirmed, but in the meantime…

For anyone who hasn’t got round to watching the second season yet, (where have you been), Joe Goldberg is told the seven totems of Los Angeles by Love Quinn. If all seven of these iconic moments are seen, you have experienced the city’s true character, and are destined to stay in L.A. Some of these totems include: seeing a pack of coyotes, a dog in a stroller, and a burning palm tree.

Now, graduation is fast approaching for our third years, and the question may cross your minds: “is Lincoln my destiny?”. Here are the Seven Totems of Lincoln, to aid your decision.

1. Students actually using the bridge

We’ve all had to make the tough decision between assuming the train won’t be long, or actually using the bridge. This decision is based on a complex mix of methodical time-efficiency, and laziness. The excessive number of stairs can actually cost you precious time if you’re running late, and there’s no worse feeling than the train chugging by as you near the top. It’s a tough one for everyone, and your decision can say a lot about you as a person.

Image may contain: Staircase, Person, Human, Railing, Handrail, Banister

2. Someone throwing up in the Brayford

Not sure that this one really needs any explanation; it happens. The chances are you’ve probably seen it happen at least once when walking past the Brayford after a night out, so it’s only fair that this one makes the list.


3. Someone stacking it at Bierkeller

Whether it’s happened to you or you’ve seen it happen to someone else, anyone finding themselves falling off one of the benches will most likely have no recollection of it… Fortunately, you tend to get a hefty bruise to commemorate the magical moment.

4. The Imp statue

We all know the one. The white goblin is supposed to appear to have crossed it’s legs, but instead it looks as though it has a massive shlong. Honestly, what were they thinking?


Think we all had to look twice at this one…

5. The Goose

Amongst the horde of geese around Lincoln’s campus, it’s this one in particular we all know and love. The one with it’s wing sticking out that represents how we all feel on the way to a 9am lecture. Sure, it’s the one that stands out the most, but it seems to get by pretty unfazed by everyone.

Image may contain: Gravel, Dirt Road, Road, Ground, Goose, Bird, Animal

6. A tourist underestimating Steep Hill

Yes it really is that steep, and you can’t really appreciate the character of Lincoln until you’ve overheard someone huff something along the lines of “they should warn people about how steep Steep Hill is”, at least once.

Image may contain: Neighborhood, Pedestrian, Cobblestone, Architecture, Sidewalk, Pavement, Building, Town, City, Downtown, Urban, Human, Person, Walkway, Path

7. A fresher in both a lanyard and a Lincoln hoodie

It’s pretty common to see most first years in the free university hoodies you get when you firm your offer on UCAS; after all they’re super comfy, so why not? A far rarer sight is spotting a fresher wearing both a Lincoln hoodie and a lanyard together. This sight is typically limited to freshers week, as everyone quickly realises that, unlike many colleges, you don’t have to wear your keys all the time. This post-Fresher’s week rarity makes it number seven on our list.

So, how many did you tick off?