These are the freshers you’ll meet at Lincoln
The gap year students are the worst
Your first year at Lincoln will be a blur of bitchy yikyaks and 1.50 vodka mixers at Quack. You’ve probably hugged at Superbull a ridiculous amount of times, discovered the communal hatred for the rugby team and have met every Tom, Dick and Harry going. You’ve almost definitely stumbled across this lot on your way, too:
The one who’s eternally pissed
From the moment they set foot on the university campus they’re drunk. Not one to miss out on the fun, they’ll be seen at every pre-drinks party, and every freshers’ event possible, and don’t you know it. When they’ve sobered up, they’ll recount the adventures they got up to – tales of drunken conquests, including vomiting in the Brayford and chasing swans. Not to mention the ever growing collection of Strongbow cans in their window!
Unlike the perpetually drunk one, this person never leaves their room. You will find them throughout either sat in the Quad, reading a book or locked away in their room like some sort of modern day Rapunzel. Come Christmas they’ll emerge, much to the shock of their flatmates who, at this point, will just be glad they’re alive!
The gap year student
While you were still struggling with your A Levels and your UCAS application, this person was backpacking across India. They’ve wrestled tigers, met the Crown Prince and eaten snake’s liver… and now they’re at Lincoln uni. Wearing “authentic” harem pants from a Mongolian Tribe and only eating quality vegan hummus this person literally screams gap year – no, literally, they tell you every ten seconds!
They’ll be there for you.
Usually a group of friends from College who stick together like glue throughout freshers – they come as a package deal, travelling together or not at all. Don’t even try to infiltrate their group as their time is spent cracking inside jokes and reminiscing about their “glory days” of sixth form. They’re like the witches from Macbeth, only with more eyes and less rhyming.
The one who’s not a student at all:
These are the people in Home probably wearing a Superdry t-shirt and some running shoes, who confess to being “not actually really being a student”, but they’re just there for the banter. How they got into a student night you’ll never know – but clearly cheap booze and annoying students doesn’t phase them. While you’ll stumble back to uni accommodation, they’ll be sat in his flat wondering what exactly the function of Yik Yak is.