University ‘lads’: Myth vs Reality

Being a student at any university, you will have undoubtedly come across the type of boys who are known around campus as the typical uni ‘lads’. They have notorious reputations for being womanisers, and are tight t-shirt wearing drink-touting knuckle-heads. But in reality, do they live up their reputation?

Personality

Myth: fun-loving, hard-partying womanisers. Very funny and friendly blokes

Reality: Desperate, potty-mouthed boys who try too hard to pull by requesting to do ‘things’ into various body parts, including their eyes; commonly spews various unfunny internet memes into discussions as a replacement for intellectual conversation or wit.

Come at me, Ladies

Drinking skills

Myth: can drink seventeen shots of Jaeger Bombs, perform seventeen push-ups and slam their balls of steel in the fridge door without even wincing.

Reality: Can’t down as much alcohol down compared to at least one non-‘lad’, likely to break down and cry after the first three shots.

Wheyyyy!

Spending money

Myth: kind enough to purchase plenty of booze for everyone.

Reality: Likely to down all the alcohol for themselves, then realising it was a big mistake.

Intelligence

Myth: They often don’t bother turning up to lectures…because they’re too cool for that shit.

Reality: “I’ve written a good essay here, and swotted in the library every morning and afternoon. No one must know I actually enjoyed some of these books.”

How hard are they?

Myth: tough sons-of-bitches, weight-lifters.

Reality: likely to trip over their own shadows and laugh uncontrollably at the word ‘hard’, making crude sex jokes whilst laying in a pile of their own broken teeth.

You stay classy!