If you’re not going to drink VKs, don’t bother coming out
We can’t lie to ourselves anymore, it should be the only drink allowed at the Leicester SU.
What is the ultimate club drink? Some might say vodka coke, others might just say the humble shot of tequila. I mean, these are all fine choices, but they are the choices of those who haven't truly experienced a proper night out. Tequila is disgusting and vodka coke is for the basic first years with no imagination. Don't even get me started on Jaegerbombs. Whilst these are noble drinks, they all pale in comparison to the real drink of club goers up and down the country. My friends, that drink is the VK.
What else do you want in a drink that a VK can't provide? They taste nice, are perfect for showing how quickly you can down a drink not called beer or cider and, I know we are all ashamed to admit it, they kinda get you really drunk. After you've seen your seventh off in the middle of the dance floor at Lets Disko to the cheers of your friends, you know you are gonna be in for a rough night. For those who haven't tasted what can only be described as "the nectar of the Gods" yet, here are a few reasons why a simple VK just cannot be beat on a night out.
They don't taste like alcohol
Do you remember those panda pops you used to get at parties when you were a kid? They were basically just sugar, but they tasted amazing. Knock back two of them and you'd be knee sliding on that dance floor like nobodies business. A VK is just the uni equivalent and yes, after one or two you will feel like knee sliding on the floor of the o2. Also we are all adults here. Alcohol tastes grim and you are a rare breed if you voluntarily drink vodka mixer or JD and coke out of your SU or a club. Even on a night out, seeing off a shot of watered down vodka, or worse the chilli vodka from Revs, just isn't nice. Save your money and make the sensible decision of buying an adult panda pop for the same price. You wont regret it.
You can buy five at once and look like a legend doing it
I've never seen anyone come back from the bar during Shabang with ten bottles of VK in their hands and not thought that person was a legend. No body looks good juggling five cups of whatever standard mixer they are bringing back, whereas with a VK, its effortless. Also, nothing is worse than buying a round at the bar and having to struggle to carry them all back. You inevitably drop some down your new top or all over your box fresh vans you couldn't wait to wear out. A VK solves this problem.
It seems like there's a never ending amount of flavours
Oh yeah, there's a blue flavour of VK. Don't mind if i do. Every time I go out I seem to stumble across a new bold and amazing flavour. This might be because I am wasted from pres before I get into the SU, but every time I buy a fresh bottle it seems to taste amazing. Apart from the red one. Only ever buy the red one as a last resort, like you are dying or something and need a VK to keep you going.
They are the only drink acceptable to drink through a straw
Did someone say strawpedo? A Vk is the only drink its OK to drink with a straw. If anything, its the only true way to drink it. It's standard on a night out to race your mates in trying to drink one first. It's a rite of passage. And I don't care if you are looking after you dental health, it shouldn't be allowed to drink a mixer of any kind through a straw on the dance floor. Just go back to the bar, say you've made a mistake and exchange it for a VK and everything will be fine.