The best places to breakdown on Leicester’s campus

Sometimes life just gets too much. You accidentally swiped left on the only half decent person to ever show up on Leicester’s Tinder, your housemate is making sure the entire house suffers through the cold – think “Just buy some thermal socks mate” – and your dissertation supervisor grits his teeth every time you see him. Sometimes, you just need to spiral. It’s ok. Luckily for you, Leicester’s campus is ready and waiting with the perfect places for you to sob about your shit postgraduate prospects.

The Paternoster

Pros – Overriding the top of the Paternoster will mean you’re alone in a black box and the sounds of your breakdown will be covered by the sound of the machinery. Surviving is also the ultimate bragging right.

Cons – On the ride up you may get eye contact with a professor whilst you sob as they wait for a free lift.

Library study rooms  

Pros – The study rooms are pretty soundproof, so no librarian need know about your impending doom. The chairs are also super comfy and the desk is at just the right height to bang your head on.

Cons – That glass though

r u ok pal x

Attenborough Tower showers

Pros – Get clean as you cleanse your soul by sobbing, killing two birds with one stone.

Cons – There’s a definite chance you’ll bump into that History professor who insists on cycling to uni every morning, but is kind to his 9am seminar, so showers as soon as he gets in. There’s also the fact you won’t actually be much cleaner afterwards as they’re grimy af.

The gym swimming pool 

Pros – If anyone asks, you can pass off your tears as a reaction to the chlorine. If you’re feeling fancy then alternate between the pool and jacuzzi as you sob.

Cons – You may be surrounded by fit and athletic people who undoubtably have their life together. Think back to those conversations in Freshers’ with Poppy who does yoga two times a week, gets firsts on all her essays and works part time, all while posting perfect Instagrams.

Yeah, we all hate Poppy

The Library Phone Zones

Pros – It’s a quick escape from the silent study zone when you realise you just can’t manage Mummy’s expectations, Leicester’s shit Tinder game and the rantings of your dissertation supervisor all at the same time.

Cons – You may have to listen to girls like Poppy calling their Mum about the shocking 69 she got on her most recent essay.

The Students’ Union toilets

Pros – You can get a Nutella bagel less than five minuets after your breakdown. Winner.

Cons – They’re a definite low point of any spiral. You’ll have to make sure toilet roll isn’t stuck to you afterwards and there’s always a risk of crying more about about how gross it is.

SU toilets and chill?