Mullets are still roaming the streets of Hyde Park, and now there’s an Instagram dedicated to them
£10 to any edgy Leeds boy who sacrifices their mullet.
In attempt to prevent further spread of COVID, lockdown measures are tightening in Hyde Park and throughout Leeds. But I think it’s time we confront the real pandemic of 2020: Mullets.
Don’t get me wrong, we all love a strapping Rugby lad, amirite ladies? But this fad has gone far enough and it’s time to stop it in its tracks. As if 2020 wasn’t already awful, we’re now forced to witness more devastating heartbreak as uni fitties go from a solid 10 to a scrawny 4 *sad reacts only*.
Now before you go cancelling me for this, I’m fine with mullets – they’re okay – it’s more the culture that comes with having one. Debuting a mullet is the middle class boy’s way of saying “I’m 12 now Mum I can do what I want”. Come on lads, you’ve thrown your toys out of the pram but isn’t it time you grew up and get a proper haircut?
Adopting this style is such a clear cry for help, testing the limits of ‘edgy Leeds’ at its finest. The craze is getting undeniable amounts of attention, so The Tab Leeds spoke to the Instagram account dedicated to rating the hairstyle. Say hello to @rate_my_mullet_leeds:
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The guys face on the right says it all – poor effort lack of commitment to the cause. What you can’t see is skinny jeans which leaves little to the imagination, paired with some 2016 yellowed huaraches – underwhelming sight in general. 1/10 from us 🤢 #mulletsofinstagram #mullet
Firstly, I’ve got to ask – why mullets?
“They seem to have taken over everywhere. The account might seem like its pro-mullet, but I’m certainly not.”
What inspired you to start the account?
“To be honest I was just bored of seeing so many awful haircuts that I decided to document all the unfortunate decisions that seem to plague Hyde Park. Also, to remind me that life could be worse and that I have respect for my hairline. Everyone who has a mullet seriously deserves to be publicly ridiculed and for this exact reason @rate_my_mullet_leeds was born.”
Have you seen any god-awful mullets in your time?
“Every mullet is awful, Leeds is definitely a hotspot, bad hair and substance abuse seem to go hand in hand. Wouldn’t go as far as god-awful but we’ve definitely got some hair abuse in the DMs that wasn’t fit for public viewing – I’ll leave that to your imagination. The worst always seem to feature blonde dye for some reason.”
With the return of uni students flocking back to Hyde Park, have you noticed an increase of poor quarantine trims?
“Been blessed with Corona so I’ve been stuck inside for the last six days isolating, because I’m not a selfish prick. I bet there’s loads of poor quarantine trims lurking around Hyde Park begging to get a table at Brudenell but thankfully I don’t have to see that. Thanks to Boris, pretty sure everyone’s gonna be locked in their houses losing the plot and itching to attack their headtop so stay tuned!”
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Quarantine is now well and truly is upon us and yes, that means no barbers boys! No fear because we’ve got an easy solution – grab your clippers and #mullet up! This spectacular submission really highlights how far the quarantine boredom has come – with a little help from mum you too could be rocking this specular look. Getting knight in shining armour vibes in the first pic from the fringe – something we haven’t yet witnessed on the page👀. The extreme triangle on the back is definitely the cherry on top, carrying it up a couple of points. Ultimately we’re going to give it a 6.5 for it’s originality and ruggedness. Quality quarantine cut👌🏽Keep ‘em coming #mulletsofinstagram #mullet #knight #fringe #corona #sorrymum #quarantine
Do you think mullets are here to stay?
What do you think the next trend will be for the ‘edgy leeds’ followers?
“Hard one that. Rattails are a good candidate but can’t imagine it would woo the Juicy Couture girls like a mullet seems to. Could double up nicely as a winter scarf too if you grow it out enough to wrap around your neck. That way, free scarf and more money to spend on pints to forget about your awful haircut.”
Look, we all love a good experiment here and there, but don’t you think this has gone far enough? Give it a rest Hugo, your one and only chat up line “business in the front, party in the back *insert obnoxious laugh here*” ISN’T going to work with us. So chop chop, £10 to the any edgy Leeds boy who sacrifices their mullet.