Everything that inevitably happened at your school prom

Gutted if you got with a teacher

Prom, Leavers, Sixth Form Ball – whatever you called it, if you went to school in the UK, you had one. From meaningful goodbye kisses to full on shagging in the bushes, here’s what doubtlessly went down at your prom.

You took about a thousand pictures

Maybe you got ready with your friends at home and your cover photo the next day was a suitably chirpy snap of you and your girlfriends all in brightly coloured dresses, cutesy glasses of champers in your manicured hands. Or perhaps you and the boys hired some sort of swish car and you got your money’s worth by taking hundreds of Bond-esque photos with it. Either way, you panicked when halfway through the night your phone declared ‘Cannot Take Photo: Storage Full’, and in your drunken state deleted what could have been a potential profile picture for a blurry selfie with some guy you had Biology with in Year 9. Great.

Serious cover photo potential

For the first time ever, school food was decent

It’s a shame you can’t remember it. Yeah, there was duck with plum sauce, but all you heard was ‘bottomless red wine’ so you can barely even remember what the starter was. Find yourself slightly nauseated by the vanilla cheesecake you’d usually scoff in one go before asking your dad to pass the water in a voice too carefully enunciated to be sober.

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Who needs food right

You cried

Literally who didn’t?

You got overly emotional over people you didn’t really know

Thought you’d cry over your best friend going to uni and potentially hardly ever seeing them again? Wrong, you’re going to have one drunken conversation about something vague and ‘deep’ (potential topics: love, sex, death, war, etc) with some utter randomer you hardly knew, before bursting into tears about never seeing them again. If only you’d been friends all this time! What if you were kindred spirits all along?

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Literally who are these people

Someone got with a teacher

Gutted if it was you. There were always rumours passed down the school from generation to generation about teachers getting with pupils and coming close to getting fired and whatnot, hardly any of them true – or so you thought, until you went to prom yourself and saw your Spanish teacher with your ex-girlfriend. Life’s a bitch.

You thanked your teachers over and over


Please never leave me

Siblings were a free for all

What is it about people’s siblings that is just so enticing? They don’t even have to be hot, but if someone brought a sibling to prom, chances are they got with someone. Or multiple people. No strings attached, it seemed, until some girl starts screaming in your ear ‘WHY THE FUCK DID YOU GET WITH MY BROTHER YOU WHORE?’.

It’s all fun and games until your brother fucks your best friend

You embarrassed yourself hugely in front of your parents

Whether you cried, vomited, had sex, or fell down a flight of stairs in front of your parents, you did something to seriously embarrass yourself. Just be thankful you can’t really remember it.

You got with an ex

Or two. You’d go off to talk and reconnect and make up before leaving each other forever, but you both knew you weren’t heading into some dark part of campus just to ‘talk’. You’d tell yourself not to do it but somehow a goodbye hug turned into a goodbye kiss and then suddenly there’s mud all over your £300 dress and god damn it why are you such a hoe with literally no self-restraint? But hey, you did actually make up, and you have a 100 day snapstreak now. Good going.

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One to show the grandkids?

Alternatively, you got with someone totally random

You kind of did fancy that guy you did Drama with in Year 11 all along.


You started forgiving people for the pettiest shit no one cared about

I’m so sorry I never paid you back that £1 for the cake sale in Year 3!!!! I’m sorry I borrowed and then lost your special four-colour biro!!!! I’m sorry I broke your favourite hair bobble!!!!!!

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Forgive and forget!!

…And also the serious shit

Yeah, you broke my heart/got with my ex/chatted shit about me/made me literally want to die, but it’s all cool.

The after party was even better

Whether you headed to a field or a shitty hometown club, the atmosphere was truly amazing. If it was a field, everyone nearly got hypothermia, and if it was a club, they played the worst kind of chart music, but no one really cared. It was enough just to be swaying along to Justin Bieber’s ‘Baby’ with your arms draped around your best friends’ necks.

You watched the sunrise from some picturesque part of town

When you were 15 and watched Skins you dreamt of a night out ending somewhere scenic with you, your friends, some cigs, and the dregs of a bottle of Peach Schnapps. And here you are: dead on your feet, makeup sweated/cried off, formalwear soiled, but finally living out your teenage dream of doing something vaguely romantic and Skins-worthy.

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