Nine frustrating Lancs moments only Lancaster students can relate to

Sorry if this makes you even MORE frustrated x

1 year ago

There are many wonderful things about being a student in Lancaster. There are also some really, really frustrating ones that are unique to the Lancaster experience. If you feel the bubble of rage in these situations, don’t worry that you’re becoming a miserable old Karen, we all feel the same. What this will teach you is that we all hate queuing and buses.

The library toilet queue

Timing your toilet breaks in the library truly is an art. You have to plan a piss during off-peak times, or if you want to get to your lecture on time, you’ve got to go at least 10 minutes earlier than you thought you did. This is even more annoying when the person at the front of the queue thinks all the toilets are full because the doors are closed, so really you’ve waited for no reason. In Britain, we love to queue, but the queues in Lancs really take the biscuit.

Going into a library toilet after someone’s done a poo

In a similar vein to the last one, this can be really frustrating. This is not to shame the library shitters, we’ve all been there. This is purely aimed at the design of the library toilets. There’s no ventilation, and because they’re individual cubicles, so there’s nowhere for the smells to go! Petition for air fresheners in every library toilet?

People who walk on the wrong side of the Spine

There is an unwritten rule for walking on the Spines, yet some people don’t stick to it. You’re just minding your business, trying to make your way to your next lecture, but you end up crashing into someone because they’re walking directly in your path. It’s either that or you have to dance around them to avoid disaster. That awkward encounter could be avoided if people just stuck to their respective sides of the Spine.

When you see a bus coming up the road but it says ‘BUS FULL’

The words every off-campus student dreads. There is no worse feeling than the sinking sensation you get when you’ve been hoping and praying for a bus with even a slither of space, but you see those words lit up in neon orange.

When you have to walk around the outskirts of Alex Square

This is a very topical frustration given the weather recently. When it’s icy, you’ve got to factor in the time it takes to walk around the side of Alex Square, which can be especially annoying when you’ve got to battle past Greggs queue. It’s not much more effort than being able to cut across the Square, but after a tiring day, you don’t want the extra walk.

The Underpass battle

You can guarantee that if you want to catch a bus from the Underpass at 1pm on a Wednesday afternoon, or about 4 or 5pm on any other afternoon, you’re going to have to fight for your place on a bus. What’s even worse is when the queue snakes up the stairs because people don’t move out of the way of the entrance. Battling for a seat on a crowded 100 is not what you want to do when you’ve just finished at uni for the day.

People who get on a 100 when they could get the 1A

Dear people who get on the 100 when they could get the 1A from Common Garden Street, I hope you realise you are the enemy of all Bowerham dwellers.

Walking the whole of the library to find a seat

It’s deadline season. You’ve dragged yourself out of the warmth and comfort of your bed, telling yourself you’re going to start your essay today. You get into the library with a Costa in hand, psyching yourself up. But no matter where you look, every single study space is taken by those who were more motivated than you. You’ve got to do the awkward walk around the library scanning every area for a seat, looking lost and losing hope. All you wanted to do was show that essay who’s boss, instead you’ve used all your energy up on trying to find a seat.

Cashpoint queuing at Sainsbury’s for Sugar

You’re better off keeping a stash of money at home specifically for Sugar. Queuing for Sugar money in the freezing Lancs cold defeats the purpose of going out: by the time you’ve made it in, you’re basically sober.

Interested in joining the Lancaster Tab? Come along to our open meeting on Wednesday 25th January from 3-5pm at Pendle Brew to learn what it’s like to write for us.